Anter
- No ke aha he mea nui ka loaʻa o nā hoaaloha?
- Hiki paha ke lilo i mau hoaaloha me kahi kanaka ʻē aʻe ma hope o ka male ʻana?
- Hoʻoholo hope
ʻO ka male ʻana ma ke ʻano o ka hoʻohiki ʻana i kāu kūpaʻa i hoʻokahi kanaka āu e aloha maoli ai, akā, no kekahi kumu, manaʻo pinepine ka poʻe he male ka hāʻawi ʻana i kou ola, kūʻokoʻa, a me ka kaohi i kekahi kanaka ʻē aʻe. ʻIke pinepine mākou e haʻi ka poʻe iā mākou he hiki ʻole ke male a noho hoa me nā kāne ʻē aʻe. ʻO kahi laʻana, inā he hoaaloha ke kāne male me ka wahine hoʻokahi, kū wale ka manaʻo kānalua ʻaʻole wale i ka wahine a ke kāne male akā i waena o kāna mau ipo wahine a me nā poʻe ʻē aʻe a puni. Pēlā pū kekahi me nā wahine, e like me ka wā e hoaaloha ai ka wahine male me kahi kāne hoʻokahi. ʻOiai i waena o nā kāne male, he mea pilikia paha kēia i nā mea he nui - e like me ke ʻano o ke aloha ʻana o ke kāne male me ka wahine male ʻole kāna wahine.
I ka ʻoiaʻiʻo, ʻaʻole hewa ka hanauna hou i ia mau manaʻo a me nā hopena, ʻoiai ka manaʻo o ka hoaaloha ʻana me kekahi kāne o ka wahine ʻē aʻe ma hope o ka male ʻana ua ʻike ʻia he hana pono ʻole. no laila ua maʻalahi mākou i kēia manaʻo i hoʻoili ʻia mai nā hanauna i hala. I kēia manawa, ʻaʻole mākou e ʻōlelo nei aia he ʻaʻohe pākēneka pakeneka e loaʻa i kahi kāne i male ʻia a hoihoi ʻole ʻia i ka wahine i kāna mau hoaaloha. ʻAʻole mākou e manaʻo nei ʻaʻohe manawa kūpono e hoʻomaka paha lākou e hana i kahi paʻa i hiki ke ʻoi aku ma mua o ka launa aloha ʻana. Eia naʻe, ke haʻi nei mākou i ka ʻoiaʻiʻo, ʻoiai ʻaʻole paha ia i kēia lā a me ke au, akā aia he mau hoa aloha ʻelua a kolohe ʻole i alakaʻi i kekahi hana moekolohe a i ʻole nā mea i ʻoi aku ma mua o ka launa aloha maikaʻi ʻole ʻole.
No ke aha he mea nui ka loaʻa o nā hoaaloha?
ʻO ka launa ʻana i kahi ʻāpana nui o kā mākou ulu noʻonoʻo a kōkua pū ia i ka mālama ʻana i kahi noʻonoʻo olakino. Pono pono nā hoaaloha no ka launa ʻana, ʻoiai ka launa ʻana me nā hoa hana ma kahi hana ʻaʻole like ia me ka leʻaleʻa ʻana i ka pō me kekahi mau hoaaloha. Kūleʻa kekahi mau hoa aloha no kahi manawa pōkole loa, ʻoiai hiki i nā poʻe ʻē aʻe ke lōʻihi i ke ola holoʻokoʻa - i kēlā me kēia ʻano, he mea nui lākou āpau no ka ulu ʻana o mākou ma ke ʻano he kanaka. Hiki iā mākou ke loaʻa nā keu pono he nui mai ka noho aloha ʻana, e like me:
- Nui ka poʻe i ʻike he hiki iā lākou ke lilo i ke ʻano ʻoiaʻiʻo ke hui pū lākou me kā lākou hoa aloha maoli, a, i ka manawa like, e ʻike ai ʻo wai lā lākou.
- Ke paʻakikī ke ola, he kākoʻo maikaʻi loa nā hoaaloha a i nā manawa he nui, he kāhea a i ʻole he leka uila wale nō.
- ʻAʻole wahaheʻe nā hoaaloha maoli iā ʻoe e pili ana i nā mea nui, ʻo ia hoʻi e haʻi lākou iā ʻoe ke hana nei ʻoe i kahi mea kūpono ʻole a kōkua iā ʻoe e "noho ma ke ala" me kou ola ma nā ʻano he nui.
- Māhele nā hoa aloha i nā ʻōlelo hoʻomākeʻaka me ʻoe a ʻakaʻaka pū me ʻoe, kahi mea nui ia o ke ola. Hōʻike ʻo Gaiam ua hōʻike ʻepekema ia-ua hōʻoia ʻia ʻo ka ʻakaʻaka e hoʻēmi ai i ke kiʻekiʻe o ke koko a me nā pae cortisol, maikaʻi no kou puʻuwai a hoʻopuka i nā endorphins i kou kino.
Wahi a Psychology I kēia lā, ʻo ka loaʻa ʻana o nā hoaaloha a me ka launa pū ʻana ʻaʻole ia he manaʻo no kāu mea e hilinaʻi ai ke paʻakikī nā mea, e kamaʻilio pū kekahi me ʻoe ke ʻeha a ʻakaʻaka pū kekahi paha ʻoe, akā paʻa pū kekahi i nā pono psychological no ʻolua a me kou mau hoaaloha. Ke hoʻomau nei lākou i ka hōʻike ʻana he nui nā noiʻi i ʻike i ke ola o nā mākua i hana mau me nā hoaaloha, ʻo ka mea hoʻi me nā hoa lōʻihi, ua ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o ke ola a me ke olakino maikaʻi ma mua o ka poʻe me ka nui ʻole o nā hoaaloha. Ma waho o kēia mau pōmaikaʻi, pilikia nui ke kaumaha i nā poʻe me ka ʻaʻohe a i ʻole he mau makamaka wale nō e ʻike ai, no ka mea ke alakaʻi nei i ka manaʻo o ka mehameha, ka hopohopo, a me ka pono ʻole.
Hiki paha ke lilo i mau hoaaloha me kahi kanaka ʻē aʻe ma hope o ka male ʻana?
I kēia manawa ua noʻonoʻo mākou i nā pōmaikaʻi i loaʻa i ka noho aloha ʻana, a no ke aha he mea pono ia i ke ola olakino, pono mākou e hoʻi i ke kumuhana mua o kā mākou kūlana - inā paha e manaʻo ʻia he maʻamau a "maikaʻi" no ka mea male. e lilo i mau hoaaloha me kekahi mea ʻē aʻe. Ua hele aku nei ʻo Hugo Schwyzer, kahi mea kākau me ka ʻAkelanika, i ka ʻaha kūkā ʻo "Bold Boundaries" ma Kikako - ʻaha kūkā. Ua wehewehe ʻo ia he mea kupaianaha loa kāna mau ʻike e like me ka mea o ka honua, i ka ʻoiaʻiʻo, e wehe ana i kahi mea hou aʻe i kahi kāne male i mau hoaaloha maikaʻi me kahi kanaka ʻē aʻe me ka ʻole o nā hopena e pāʻani ana. Ua wehewehe ʻo ia ʻo nā Karistiano i hele i ka ʻaha kūkā e kamaʻilio ākea nei e pili ana i ka ʻoiaʻiʻo, hiki i kahi kāne male ke lilo i mau hoaaloha maikaʻi me ka wahine hoʻokahi, me ka ʻole o ka moekolohe. Ma ke ala like, hiki i kahi wahine i male ʻia ke lilo i mau hoaaloha me kekahi kāne ʻē aʻe a i ʻole kahi kāne kāne wale nō, me ka ʻole o ka moekolohe ma waena o lāua.
I pane hope loa i kēia nīnau, e nānā mua mākou i ka pono o ka noho aloha ʻana i loko o ko mākou ola a laila e noʻonoʻo i kahi ʻoiaʻiʻo koʻikoʻi loa. Nui ka hapa nui o nā Karistiano e mare i ko lākou iwakāluakūmālua mau makahiki - ʻo kēia ka manaʻo o nā kāne ʻelua e mare nei e komo wale ana i ko lākou wā makua ma hope o ka male ʻana, a ʻo ia nō hoʻi ka mea ʻoiaʻiʻo nō, ʻaʻole lākou i hana i kahi kālā kūpono. o na makamaka makua. Ke male a kekahi ma kahi makahiki ʻōpio, ʻo ia ka manaʻo e lilo paha lākou i mau hoaaloha me nā kāne like me ke koena o ko lākou ola? He kūpono ʻole kēlā noi ʻana e noi aku i kekahi, a ʻoiaʻiʻo ʻaʻole lākou e makemake e lilo i mau hoaaloha me ka poʻe o ka like wahine e like me lākou no 50 mau makahiki e hiki mai ana akā makemake lākou i nā koho like ʻole o nā hoa, kēlā me kēia me kā lākou nā mōhai kūikawā e lawe i ka pōʻai o kēlā kanaka.
Hoʻoholo hope
ʻOiai aia ka manaʻo nui i waena o ka poʻe ʻaʻole hiki i ka mea i mare ʻia ke lilo i mau hoaaloha me kekahi kāne ʻē aʻe, a i ʻole he mea kānalua paha ia, akā i kēia manawa ke ʻike nui nei ka poʻe i kēia manaʻo. ʻO ka male ʻana ʻaʻole ia he kumu no ke kānalua. Hiki i nā kānaka ke hoa aloha me kekahi o ka ʻaoʻao ʻē aʻe me ka ʻole o ka lilo ʻana i ka moekolohe iā lākou a me ka ʻole o ka hoʻohiki i kā lākou male a hōʻeha paha i ka mea a lākou i male ai. I kēia au, he mea nui e hoʻomaʻa i nā loli o ka honua a ʻae i nā mea liʻiliʻi e like me kēia, i mea e ulu ai ke kanaka.
Will O'Conner
He Kākoʻo olakino a olakino ʻo ia no ʻO Digest Health Digest. Makemake ʻo ia e kākau e pili ana i nā kumuhana General Health & Fitness. Manaʻoʻiʻo ʻo Will i ka hāʻawi ʻana i ka ʻike ʻike i ka poʻe heluhelu a hoʻoikaika mau iā lākou e hoʻokō i kā lākou mau pahuhopu. Nui kona makemake e pili ana i ka huakaʻi, nā hana noʻeau a ʻike a kākau hoʻi no nā poʻe. Hoʻohui ma o: Facebook, Twitter, & Google+.