Anter
- Nā mea hiki ke loaʻa o ka male kāne male
- ʻIke ʻia he maoli
- Hoʻonui i ka maikaʻi a me ka lōʻihi
- Nā pono i hāʻawi ʻia e ke aupuni
- ʻO nā pilikia kūpono o ka male kāne male
- ʻAʻole holo kekahi mea
- Hōʻoki ka wahine male male
- Ke komo nei i ka pono
- E kamaʻilio me kāu hoa!
ʻO ke ala i ka kaulike kaulike kahi lōʻihi. I kēia hiki ʻana mai, e nīnau ana paha ʻoe iā ʻoe iho inā ʻoe e lawe i ka luʻu. Inā ʻaʻole ʻoe e nīnau iā ʻoe iho i kēlā nīnau, paipai wau iā ʻoe e hana! ʻO ka pinepine, lele ka poʻe i ka male me ka ʻole o ka noʻonoʻo hou ʻana. ʻo ia wale nō kāu e manaʻo ai e hana, ʻeā? ʻAʻole pono. Hele mai kahi male kū kānāwai me nā pōmaikaʻi a me nā hopena, a ʻaʻole paha ia he koho kūpono no kāu waiwai a me nā moemoeā ma ke ʻano he kāne. Ke lawe nei ʻoe i ka manawa e noʻonoʻo ai i ka male ʻana ma ke kānāwai, eia kekahi mau manaʻo āu e makemake ai i kahi kamaʻilio.
Nā mea hiki ke loaʻa o ka male kāne male
ʻIke ʻia he maoli
Mālama ka male kānāwai i ke kaupaona o ka pono; lilo kou pilina i "maoli" a loaʻa ka hilinaʻi pili kaiaulu inā male ʻoe. I kahi kekelē, hiki ke loaʻa kēia mau pono kaiaulu mai kahi male a i ʻole ka hana hoʻohiki, me ka ʻole o nā pili kū kānāwai. Eia nō naʻe, pono paha ʻoe e paio me nā nīnau (iā ʻoe ia a i ʻole nā haʻi ʻē aʻe) inā paha maoli helu, inā ʻaʻole kū kānāwai. ʻO ka pane i mea nui, ʻoiaʻiʻo, ʻo ia ka pane i loko o kou puʻuwai a me kāu puʻuwai.
Hoʻonui i ka maikaʻi a me ka lōʻihi
Hōʻike ka noiʻi e hoʻopōmaikaʻi i kou pilina i ka maikaʻi (e like me MacIntosh, Reissing, & Andruff, 2010) a me ka lōʻihi (e like me Kurdek, 2000) o kāu pilina. Eia nō naʻe, ʻo ka hoʻohanohano a me ka ʻike ʻana paha i ka pili kaiaulu ka mea e lawa pono ai ka maikaʻi o ka pilina (Fingerhut & Maisel, 2010). ʻO ka mea i hāʻawi ʻia i ka male ma ke kānāwai he mea pale i ka haʻalele ʻana, kahi a ka noiʻi e hōʻike nei he mea kōkua nui i ka lōʻihi (e like me Kurdek, 2000). I kēlā me kēia pili wā lōʻihi, hiki i nā manawa ke hoʻonāukiuki ʻia kekahi a ʻelua paha mau hoa hana, ʻaʻole hoʻokō ʻia, a ke nīnau pū nei paha i ka pilina. ʻO nā mea pale e like me ka male ma ke kānāwai e paʻakikī i kekahi e haʻalele i ka pilina. ʻOiaʻiʻo, hiki i nā mea pale ke hoʻopili pū i kahi hana kaiaulu, nā keiki, kahi molaki, a i ʻole nā pilina ʻē aʻe e hoʻopaʻa ai; ʻAʻole wale ka male kū kānāwai.
Nā pono i hāʻawi ʻia e ke aupuni
ʻO ka ʻōlelo maʻamau, makemake kā mākou aupuni i ka poʻe i male male ʻia. Loaʻa i nā kāne male i ka nui o nā pono kū kānāwai, nā pono, a me nā kuleana i hāʻawi ʻole ʻia i nā kāne male ʻole. Hāʻawi ke male male kū kānāwai i nā kuleana ʻelua a me nā kuleana ma luna o kāu mau keiki. Manaʻo ia ʻolua ʻelua he mau ʻona ʻelua o nā waiwai āu i loaʻa ai i ka wā o ka male. Inā make kekahi o ʻoukou, ʻo ka loaʻa ʻana o ka male male ma ke kānāwai e maʻalahi ai ka hana ʻana me nā ʻāpana he nui o nā hoʻonohonoho. Loaʻa i nā kāne male i nā pōmaikaʻi mālama ola, nā pono olakino, a me nā mea ʻē aʻe. Hoʻohui ʻia, no ka poʻe o ʻoukou i aloha aloha i kahi kamaʻāina ʻole US, e hoʻomākaukau kahi male kū kānāwai i ke ala e pili ana i ka neʻe ʻana a me ke kamaʻāina US.
ʻO nā pilikia kūpono o ka male kāne male
ʻAʻole holo kekahi mea
ʻO ka male, ma ke ʻano he kula, ua hele i loko o nā hoʻololi he nui. Ua hoʻololi ʻia mai kahi ala e loaʻa ai ka waiwai, ka mana, a me ke kūlana, i kahi manaʻolana kaiaulu, i, i kēia manawa wale nō, kahi hana o ke aloha (Coontz, 2006). Eia nō naʻe, hāʻawi ʻia ma kahi o ka hapalua o nā kāne heterosexual a pau i male ʻia e kā lākou hapalua kanalima, me he mea lā palekana ke ʻōlelo ʻana ʻaʻole e hana ana kekahi mea e pili ana i ka male. Kūpono nā kāne a me nā kāne like ʻole i nā pilikia like ʻole i kā lāua pilina e like me ka hana a nā kāne heterosexual, pākuʻi nā mea hou aʻe i kū hoʻokahi i ka male like. ʻO ka male male kāne kolohe paha, no laila, e ukali i kahi ʻano like. Ma ka liʻiliʻi loa, he mea nui e noʻonoʻo i kāu mau mea i manaʻo ai no ka manaʻo o ka male, hana, a like paha me kou ola.
Hōʻoki ka wahine male male
ʻOiai ʻaʻohe mea e komo i ka male me ka manaʻo e hemo lākou, hiki i ka manawa ke hōʻoia i kekahi manaʻo. ʻO ka nui o nā pono kū kānāwai o ka male, keu hoʻi e pili ana i nā kuleana o kāu mau keiki, lawelawe i nā mea pale i ka hihia o ka hemo, kahi pōmaikaʻi ia. ʻO ke kuhi o ka ʻāpana like ʻana o ka waiwai, hiki i kahi drawback. I nā mokuʻāina he nui, pili ka male ma ke kānāwai i nā waiwai āpau, ka waiwai, ka waiwai, a aie iā ʻolua like, me ka nānā ʻole i nā mea i loaʻa i ka wā o ka male a i ʻole ʻo wai ka "hewa" no ka hemo ʻana. Hoʻohui ʻia, hiki i ka hemo a me ke kolohe. Koi lākou i nā palapala kū kānāwai, kahi hele ʻana o ka ʻaha, a me ka makemake pinepine i nā ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo kū kānāwai. Pau ka paʻakikī ka hoʻopau ʻana i kahi pilina; ʻoi aku ka paʻakikī ke kiʻi ʻana i kahi hemo.
Ke komo nei i ka pono
ʻO ka male kānāwai kahi ʻōnaehana o ke kuleana. I ka moʻomeheu Komohana, ua hoʻokumu wale ʻia ke kahua o ka male no nā kāne heterosexual. Ke kono nei i nā hana maʻa mau i ke komo ʻana i kahi ʻoihana kapitalistic, a hoʻokumu hou ʻia i ka heteronormativity. Hāʻawi nā male male i nā kuleana i hōʻole ʻia i ka poʻe hiki ʻole a i ʻole koho e lilo i male male. Hoʻohui ʻia, ʻaʻole kākoʻo kekahi mau kaiāulu manaʻoʻiʻo a i ʻole nā ʻōnaehana hilinaʻi i nā kāne a me ka wahine like e komo pū ana i ka pono o ka male. ʻAʻole kūpono paha kēia mau ʻaoʻao o ka male kānāwai no kekahi mau kāne a me nā ʻōnaehana hilinaʻi.
E kamaʻilio me kāu hoa!
Nui nā moeʻuhane i hoʻopaʻa ʻia me ka noho pū ʻana o kahi ola. ʻO ka male ʻole paha ke ala e hoʻokō ʻia ai kēlā mau moemoeā. E kamaʻilio me kāu hoa e pili ana i kēlā mau moemoeā. E kamaʻilio e pili ana i kāu mau kumu no ka makemake ʻana (a makemake ʻole paha) e male. E nīnau kekahi i kekahi, “He aha manaʻo iā mākou e male ʻia i ke kānāwai, a he aha ka manaʻo inā ʻaʻole mākou e koho? " E kūkākūkā i kāu mau hopena i nā pilikia a me nā pilikia. Hiki i ke ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo keu ma mua ke lilo i ala maikaʻi loa no ka ʻimi ʻana i kēia mau nīnau a hoʻomākaukau i kāu no nā mea e hiki mai ana.
ʻOiai ʻo ka mea āu e manaʻoʻiʻo ai, ʻo ʻoe hiki Loaʻa i kāu mau moeʻuhane āpau no ke aloha, ʻohana, a me ke ola-nui (hiki iā ʻoe ke hana i ka male o kāu mau moeʻuhane) mawaho ke male male ʻana ... inā makemake ʻoe. ʻOiaʻiʻo, ʻaʻohe mea hewa i ka male ʻana. ʻO ka mea nui ua hāʻawi ʻoe i kahi noʻonoʻo, ua kūkākūkā pū ʻoe ia, ʻike ʻoe no ke aha mai ke koho nei ʻoe iā ia, a maikaʻi ʻoe, a hilinaʻi hoʻi, e pili ana i ka hoʻoholo.