Anter
- 1. Ua hoʻopaʻa lākou i kekahi i kekahi no nā kumu kūpono āpau
- 2. ʻAʻole lākou i manaʻo e lilo ka male i pane i nā pilikia o ke ola
- 3. No ke aloha e mau, e noho mau ka mahalo
- 4. Aia ke kamaʻilio mahalo, ʻoiai ke hoʻopaʻapaʻa
- 5. ʻO ke aloha ponoʻī ka mea mua
- 6. E kokoke mau ana ke kala ʻana
- 7. Pili lākou i nā ʻano he nui, e like me ka moekolohe
- 8. ʻAʻole lākou poina i nā mea liʻiliʻi
Makemake mau paha aia kahi hana hoʻokalakupua i hiki iā ʻoe ke ukali e hōʻoia i ka lōʻihi o kāu pilina? Kahi alakaʻi i hōʻike i nā ʻanuʻu e pono ai ʻoe e hāhai i laila ʻoe a me kāu hoa e noho hauʻoli ai?
ʻĀ, ʻaʻole ia he kilokilo pono, akā aia kekahi mau manaʻo maʻamau e kaʻana like ka hauʻoli a me ka pili lōʻihi. E nānā i kēia mau ʻano o nā pilina mau a ʻike i nā mea hiki iā mākou ke aʻo.
1. Ua hoʻopaʻa lākou i kekahi i kekahi no nā kumu kūpono āpau
Ke haʻaheo nei nā kāne 20, 30 a 40 paha mau makahiki o ka male (a ʻoi paha) ua koho lākou kekahi i kekahi no nā kumu kūpono. ʻAʻole lākou i male ma muli o ke kaomi kaiaulu, a no ka mehameha, a no ka nānā ʻana o kekahi o kā lākou hoa e "hoʻoponopono" i kahi wā kamaliʻi maikaʻi ʻole a i ʻole nā mea ʻeha ʻē aʻe.
ʻAʻole, ua male lāua no ka mea aloha lāua i kā lāua hoapili nona ka mea pono i kēlā manawa a ma laila (ʻaʻole male i kāna "hiki", akā ʻo kāna "ʻānō"), a ua manaʻo lākou i kahi pilina koʻikoʻi me lākou. Ua ʻōlelo pū lākou ua komo lākou i loko o ka pilina me nā ukana ʻona a i ʻole i hoʻonā ʻole ʻia, no laila he ʻano noʻonoʻo olakino lākou ke hana nei i kā lākou hoa.
2. ʻAʻole lākou i manaʻo e lilo ka male i pane i nā pilikia o ke ola
Ua komo nā kāne lōʻihi i loko o kā lāua male me nā mea i manaʻo ʻia.
Aloha nui lākou, ʻoiaʻiʻo, akā ʻike pū ʻia ʻaʻole hiki i kā lākou hoa ke hoʻokō i nā kuleana āpau e pono ai ke ola kaulike. ʻAʻole lākou i manaʻo i kā lākou hoa e lilo i mea ʻai, ka hoa aloha, ka haʻuki haʻuki, ke kumu ola, ka mea mālama pēpē, ka mea lapaʻau, a me ka mea hoʻolālā hoʻomaha a me kahi loea kālā.
Ua ʻike lākou he ikaika ko nā mea a me nā nāwaliwali nā kānaka āpau, a no ka mea hope loa, he kī ke outsourcing i ka hoʻomau ʻana o ka male. Hoʻomaopopo pū lākou i ka mea nui o ka mālama ʻana ma waho o ka noho aloha ʻana a hana i nā mea hou, i hiki i nā hoa ʻelua ke hana i nā mea kūʻokoʻa i kekahi i kekahi.
Ua haʻi aku nā kāne ʻelemakule i kahi ʻike e aloha a ebbs a kahe ana, a ʻo ka male ʻana ʻaʻole ia he manaʻo nui a me nā ahi ahi i kēlā me kēia lā o ka makahiki. Ua mana lākou i nā lā haʻahaʻa, me ka ʻike e aloha i nā kuleana i kāna papa a hoʻi mai ka pilina inā makemake kekahi e hana i nā manawa paʻakikī.
3. No ke aloha e mau, e noho mau ka mahalo
ʻAʻole pono ʻoe i ka mahalo e hāʻule i ke kuko.
ʻO ia nā mea o hoʻokahi-pō kū. Akā no ke aloha kūpaʻa ʻoiaʻiʻo, pono i kahi kāne e mahalo a mahalo kekahi i kekahi. Makemake ʻoe e nānā i kekahi nona nā waiwai, nā loina a me nā loina e kūlike me kāu.
Inā ʻaʻole lākou, malia paha e hohonu a pili ka pilina. A, ʻo ka mahalo kekahi o nā ʻano nui o nā pili mau.
4. Aia ke kamaʻilio mahalo, ʻoiai ke hoʻopaʻapaʻa
ʻO nā kāne e hoʻohauʻoli nei i nā makahiki he nui o ko lāua noho male ʻana, ʻōlelo lāua ua kamaʻilio maikaʻi lāua, ʻoiai ke ala mai nā hakakā.
ʻAʻole lākou e huli i ka hea inoa ʻana a i ʻole ka lawe ʻana i nā maʻi i hala ke kaua. Hana lākou i ka kuʻikahi a me ke ʻano ʻoluʻolu, ke hoʻolohe nei i ka manaʻo o kekahi a me ka hōʻoia ʻana e hōʻike ua lohe ʻia lākou. ʻIke lākou ʻaʻole hiki i nā mea i haʻi ʻia ke haʻi ʻole ʻia, no laila hoʻomanaʻo lākou i ka wā e wela ai nā kūkākūkā.
ʻO ka mea hope loa a lākou e makemake ai e hana ʻeha i ka mea a lākou i aloha nui ai (ʻoiai lākou e hoʻopaʻapaʻa ana).
5. ʻO ke aloha ponoʻī ka mea mua
E nānā i kekahi mau kāne wā lōʻihi a e ʻike ʻoe e hoʻomaʻamaʻa lākou iā lākou iho me ka mālama pū kekahi i kekahi. Hana lākou e mālama i ko lākou olakino a me ke olakino.
ʻO kēia ke hāʻawi nei lākou i ka manawa e hoʻomaʻamaʻa i kahi haʻuki a lākou e hauʻoli ai. Inā ʻaʻole kau ka mea o kā lākou hoa me kā lākou makemake, ʻaʻohe mea nui, e hana lākou i kā lākou mea ponoʻī. ʻO kekahi paha he mea holo, ʻo ka mea nui aʻe o ka fan fan yoga, a ʻae lākou no kēia mau manawa wale nō ke ʻike lākou he ʻāpana kēia o kahi pilina olakino.
Inā manaʻo kekahi a mea ʻē aʻe paha i ka pono e hana i kekahi mau pilikia noʻonoʻo me kahi mea hoʻoponopono ma waho, aia ke kākoʻo a me ka paipai no kēia.
ʻO ka pilina olakino ka makana o nā mea olakino ʻelua, a ʻike ka mau wā lōʻihi i kēia.
6. E kokoke mau ana ke kala ʻana
"Mai hele a hiamoe me ka huhū" ʻo ia nā ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo maʻamau a mākou a pau i lohe ai, a noʻonoʻo pono nā kāne lōʻihi. ʻAe, hakakā lākou. Akā hana lākou i ka pilikia, ke lawe nei i ka manawa e pono ai e loaʻa i kahi hoʻonā, a laila waiho lākou ma hope o lākou.
"E kala mai iaʻu" a "E kala aku wau iā ʻoe" kekahi ʻāpana o kā lākou huaʻōlelo. ʻAʻole lākou i huhū, a, e like me ka mea i ʻōlelo ʻia ma luna, ʻaʻole lākou e huki i ka huhū kahiko e hoʻā i ke ahi o kahi ʻaelike hou ʻole. Ua hala ka mea i hala, a ua kala ʻia. A e like me ka mahalo, ke kala ʻana kekahi o nā ʻano nui o nā pili mau.
7. Pili lākou i nā ʻano he nui, e like me ka moekolohe
ʻAe, ʻo nā kāne e hoʻolauleʻa ana i ko lākou 50th anniversary e hōʻoiaʻiʻo i nā keu pono e lawe ʻia e ka wahine maikaʻi i kā lāua pili. Aia nā lepe i ka libido, akā, akā e ʻike mau nā kāne lōʻihi i ko lākou ala hoʻi i ka lumi moe ma hope. Inā ʻike lākou i ka hemo ʻana o ka moekolohe, ʻike lākou i kēia manaʻo aia kekahi mea ʻē aʻe i loko o ka pilina a ʻaʻole lākou e hoʻokaʻulua e nīnau i kā lākou hoa i ka mea e hana nei.
He mea nui ka moekolohe maʻamau no ka pili mau.
8. ʻAʻole lākou poina i nā mea liʻiliʻi
ʻIke paha ʻoe i ka nānā ʻana o nā kāne hou i nā ʻōuli liʻiliʻi o ke aloha? Pehea lākou e lawe mai ai i nā pua, hoʻouna i kēlā me kēia i nā ʻōlelo leʻaleʻa, a hāʻawi i nā makana "no ke kumu ʻole"?
ʻAʻole hoʻopau nā kāne lōʻihi e hana i kēia ma hope o ka pau ʻana o ka hilahila mua o ke aloha mua.
He puʻupuʻu pūʻiwa, kahi mele aloha e ʻōlelo wale ai "Ke noʻonoʻo nei wau iā ʻoe" ... ʻo kēia mau mea liʻiliʻi e manaʻo nui a hoʻomau i ka pili i nā makahiki. A ʻo kēia nō nā ʻano o nā pilina mau loa.