Anter
- He aha ka hōʻoia?
- Hānai hānai aloha
- ʻAʻole ka hōʻoia no ka poʻe puʻuwai
- Pehea wau e hōʻoia ai?
- ʻOi aku ka maʻalahi o ka hōʻoia me ka hoʻomaʻamaʻa
He mea hoʻomākeʻaka nā pilina. Mai kahi kuanaʻike waho, he mea like paha ia o kahi mea ʻano ʻē e hoʻokau iā ʻoe iho i ka noho maikaʻi ʻana o kekahi kanaka ma muli o kekahi pili pili ʻole i kapa ʻia ʻo "Aloha." Akā hana mākou. Hoka mākou, a hoʻāʻo hou; i kekahi manawa pinepine, e ʻimi nei i ka launa pū e hoʻopuka i nā manaʻo o ke aloha a me ka noho ʻana. A ʻoiai, ʻaʻole paʻa ke aloha. Hiki ke mae a puhi me ka mālama ʻole. Mahalo, aia kekahi mea ʻepekema e aloha ai; a aia kekahi ala maoli e hōʻoia ai ʻaʻole ia e noho wale i kāu pilina, akā ulu aʻe: Hōʻoia.
He aha ka hōʻoia?
Ke nīnau ʻia wau e pili ana i nā mea nui a hiki i ka wahine e hana ai e pili mau, hāʻawi pinepine wau i nā pane he 3: Pono i kāu mea, empathize, a hōʻoia. ʻOiai hiki i nā mea mua ʻelua ke loaʻa i kā lākou mau ʻatikala ponoʻī, makemake wau e nānā i ke kolu no ka mea he kumu pinepine ia na haʻi.
He aha ka hōʻoia? ʻO ka makemake e hoʻomaopopo i ka manaʻo o haʻi (kikoʻī i kāu hoapili ma kēia hihia) ʻike ʻia e like me ke ʻano o ka objective, a me ka objectively pono. ʻAʻole ʻae ʻia me lākou, ʻaʻole ʻōlelo ʻia ua pololei lākou. Ke hoʻomaopopo maʻalahi nei i kā lākou kuanaʻike a me ka hāhai ʻana i kā lākou kūpili kūloko.
Hānai hānai aloha
ʻO ke kumu aʻu e manaʻoʻiʻo nei hiki i ka hiki ke hōʻoia he mākau koʻikoʻi ia no ka hoʻonui ʻana i kāu pilina me kāu hoa. I mea e hōʻoiaʻiʻo ai i kekahi, pono ʻoe e ʻae e hoʻomaopopo iā lākou; a ʻo ka nui o kāu ʻimi ʻana i ka ʻike, ʻo ka nui o ka manaʻo o kāu pakanā e palekana i ka kaʻana like ʻana i kā lākou ao me ʻoe. ʻO ka palekana o ko lākou manaʻo, ʻo ka maʻalahi o ka hoʻonui ʻana i ke aloha i ka launa.
He alanui ʻelua naʻe ia. Inā hana kekahi i nā mea āpau i ka hōʻoia ʻana a ʻaʻole hoʻokomo ka mea ʻē aʻe i ka hana, a laila hiki paha i ka manawa e hana ai i kahi hana. Koi ʻia ʻo ʻolua ʻelua e palupalu, ʻaʻole maʻalahi mau!
ʻAʻole ka hōʻoia no ka poʻe puʻuwai
ʻO ka hōʻoia kekahi o kēlā mau mākau e kani maikaʻi loa, a me ka hoʻomaʻamaʻa hiki ke lawe i ke aloha i kāu pilina i kahi pae ʻē aʻe; akā ʻaʻole ia he hana maʻalahi mau. He pilina ikaika a kūpaʻa hoʻi ia e hiki ai ke ʻau i ka hopena hohonu a ʻike i ka manaʻo o kāu hoa iā ʻoe me ka pale ʻole ʻana.
Pehea wau e hōʻoia ai?
Inā wau e haʻi iā ʻoe i ka mea nui e hōʻoia ai i kāu pakanā, pono paha wau e hele e haʻi iā ʻoe pehea e hana ai, ʻeā? Eia eia:
- E ʻike pono i ka mea a lākou e ʻōlelo nei. Inā ʻaʻole ʻoe e ʻike kikoʻī i kā lākou e kamaʻilio nei, e noi no ka wehewehe. E ʻike pono ʻoe e haʻi aku i kāu hoa i nā ʻāpana e nalo ana nāu. ʻO kekahi manawa maʻalahi ka kamaʻilio hewa ʻana e like me ka lohe ʻole ʻana i kahi huaʻōlelo a ʻike ʻole paha i ke ʻano o ia mea.
- E hāhai i ka manaʻo kūloko o kā lākou ʻōlelo. ʻAʻole pono ia e noʻonoʻo i ka mea nui i mea nui. Makaʻu ka poʻe i nā ʻōpala ʻoiai ʻaʻole makaʻu makaʻu ka hapanui o lākou. Inā hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻohui i kā lākou unuhi o ka mea e hana nei i ko lākou mau manaʻo, a laila maikaʻi ʻoe i kou ala e hōʻoia iā lākou!
- E hoʻomanaʻo ʻaʻole pili iā ʻoe. He ʻoiaʻiʻo loa kēia inā ʻo ʻoe ka "pilikia." ʻO kekahi mea āu i ʻōlelo ai, hana ai, a i ʻole hana i kekahi leka i kāu hoa, a ke pane nei lākou i kēlā leka. ʻO ka mālama ʻana i kēia i ka noʻonoʻo e pale iā ʻoe i ka pale ʻana a me ka hōʻino ʻana i kā lākou ʻike.
- Hōʻike i kou ʻike. Holo i kahi pae mai ka mea a kāu hoa i ʻike ai, ma o kā lākou unuhi ʻana, a i loko o kā lākou mau manaʻo. E haʻi kēia iā lākou ua maopopo iā ʻoe kahi a lākou e hele mai nei.
ʻOi aku ka maʻalahi o ka hōʻoia me ka hoʻomaʻamaʻa
E like me ka hapa nui o nā mea, hiki i ka hōʻoia ʻana i ka kuanaʻike o kāu hoa he mākau e hoʻomaʻamaʻa. ʻO ka makemake e hoʻomaʻamaʻa iā ia, ʻo ka maʻalahi ka maʻalahi. A ʻo ka nui o kāu a me kāu hoa e hōʻoia ai i kekahi, ʻo ka hohonu o kou pilina e lilo.
Hiki ke ʻōlelo ʻia e pili ana i ka mea nui o ka hōʻoia ʻana i kāu pakanā, akā ʻo kēia kahi e haʻalele ai wau iā ia i kēia lā. He aha kekahi mau ala āu i manaʻo ai ua hōʻoia ʻia i kāu pilina?