Anter
- Pehea nā pilina me ke ʻano hilinaʻi ʻole?
- 1. Nīnau mau ʻoe iā lākou i ka hōʻoia no nā mea āpau
- 2. Nānā mau ʻoe i kā lākou pāpili kaiaulu
- 3. Koi aku ʻoe i nā ʻōlelo huna i kā lākou waihona
- 4. Hoʻoweliweli ʻia ʻoe e nā poʻe uʻi ke noho ʻoe me kāu hoa
- 5. Nīnau aku ʻoe i nā poʻe ʻē aʻe e hōʻoia i kahi o kāu hoa
Ua kū paha ʻoe e nīnau iā ʻoe iho 'ua hilinaʻi ʻoe i kāu hoa?'
ʻO nā manawa inā ʻoe i nīnau iā ʻoe iho i kēlā nīnau, aia paha kahi ʻike subconscious o ka hilinaʻi ʻole i kāu pilina.
A inā aia kekahi inikua o kahi kānalua no ka holo ʻole o kāu pilina ma ka hilinaʻi a laila hiki paha i ka manawa e hoʻolohe i kou noʻonoʻo subconscious a hoʻomaka e ʻike i ke kumu. ʻOi aku no ka pili ʻole o ka pilina me ka hilinaʻi ʻole - ʻo ka hilinaʻi ka pōhaku kihi o ka pilina ma hope o nā mea āpau.
Pehea nā pilina me ke ʻano hilinaʻi ʻole?
ʻElua mau kumu no ke kumu e hoʻomaka ai ʻoe e nīnau iā ʻoe iho 'hilinaʻi ʻoe i kāu hoa?'
- No ka mea he mau hanana maoli paha e hāpai i ka hilinaʻi ʻole - e like me ka moe kolohe, ka hōʻihi ʻole, ka wahaheʻe i ka laulā a i ʻole ka hoʻokuʻu pinepine ʻia ʻana ma ka ʻaoʻao o kāu hoapili a wahine paha.
- Inā ua ʻike ʻoe i nā pilina me ka hilinaʻi ʻole o ka wā i hala a paʻakikī i ka hilinaʻi ʻana i kekahi.
No kēia mau ʻano pilina ʻelua, aia kahi hopena mau, e hoʻomaka me ke aʻo ʻana pehea e hoʻomohala ai i ka hilinaʻi a i ʻole me ke aʻo ʻana pehea e hilinaʻi hou ai.
I nā kūlana ʻelua, e hoʻokau ka ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo iā ʻoe i kahi maikaʻi no ka wā e hiki mai ana a pale iā ʻoe mai ka ʻike ʻana i kahi pilina hilinaʻi ʻole.
ʻO ka pilikia nō naʻe; ʻaʻole maʻalahi ka haʻi ʻana inā hilinaʻi ʻoe i kāu hoa. No laila e kōkua iā ʻoe ma aneʻi kekahi mau hiʻohiʻona hiʻohiʻona o nā ʻano a mākou e hana ai inā ʻaʻole mākou e hilinaʻi i kā mākou hoa.
1. Nīnau mau ʻoe iā lākou i ka hōʻoia no nā mea āpau
He hoʻomaʻamaʻa olakino ka hoʻomaʻamaʻa ʻana i ka ʻike, a aia paha kekahi mau manawa ke noi ʻoe no kahi hōʻoia o kahi mea a kāu hoa e kamaʻilio pū nei me ʻoe. ʻO ka ʻokoʻa ka hōʻike e koi ʻia ʻaʻole ia he hōʻike no ka ʻoiaʻiʻo he ʻoiaʻiʻo lākou, akā ʻoi aku ka nui o kā lākou ʻike i ka ʻike - aia kekahi ʻokoʻa.
No laila inā ʻike ʻoe iā ʻoe iho e noi ana i nā hōʻike e hōʻoia iā ʻoe i ka mea a kāu pakanā a kāne paha e ʻōlelo nei, ke hana a noʻonoʻo paha ʻo ia ka ʻoiaʻiʻo a laila ʻo ia kahi hiʻohiʻona surefire o kahi pilina me ka hilinaʻi ʻole.
2. Nānā mau ʻoe i kā lākou pāpili kaiaulu
Aia hou ka pane i kēia i ka pōʻaiapili. Inā ʻoe a me kāu wahine e kaʻana like i kāu pāpili kaiapili, kelepona, a me ke komo ʻana i ka leka uila no ka maʻalahi a he mea like ia - ʻaʻole he koi, a laila ʻo ka manawa kūpono he hoʻoholo olakino kēia.
Akā inā hiki iā ʻoe ke komo no ka mea ua koi ʻoe iā ia (i hiki iā ʻoe ke nānā i kā lākou pili) a i ʻole inā ʻike ʻoe iā ʻoe iho e kiaʻi kānalua ana i kā lākou pili ma lalo o nā ʻano, ke noho nei ʻoe i kahi pilina me ka hilinaʻi ʻole.
3. Koi aku ʻoe i nā ʻōlelo huna i kā lākou waihona
Inā ʻaʻole he kumu kikoʻī no ke kiʻi ʻana i kāu moʻokāki a i ʻole nā ʻikena a kāu kāne (e like me ke kumu ʻoihana a olakino paha) a laila ke koi nei i ke komo i kā lākou moʻokāki kahi hana kuhihewa ʻia. ʻOi aku inā ʻoe e koi nei i ke kiʻi no ka nānā ʻana i nā kumu.
ʻO kēia ʻano hana he paheʻe ia i kahi pilina me ka hilinaʻi ʻole e pono ʻoe e pale wikiwiki e hōʻalo i ka luku ʻana i kahi mea maikaʻi.
4. Hoʻoweliweli ʻia ʻoe e nā poʻe uʻi ke noho ʻoe me kāu hoa
ʻO ka makaʻu makaʻu ʻia e nā poʻe uʻi e puni ana i kāu pakanā ʻaʻole ia he hōʻailona o ka pilina me ka hilinaʻi ʻole. Hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻohaʻahaʻa haʻahaʻa a hilinaʻi ʻole paha.
Akā inā ʻaʻole pēlā, mai hilinaʻi pono ʻoe i kāu hoa e kūpaʻa ai iā ʻoe.
5. Nīnau aku ʻoe i nā poʻe ʻē aʻe e hōʻoia i kahi o kāu hoa
Ke hōʻoia nei i kahi o kāu pakanā a i ʻole kahi wahine ʻo ia kahi ʻano kānalua loa e lawe ʻaʻole wale iā ʻoe, akā i kāu hoa a me kā lākou mau hoaaloha i loko o kahi pilina hilinaʻi ʻole.
Ma hope o nā mea āpau, no ke aha ʻoe e manaʻo ai e nīnau i kāu hoa?
E hoʻokele ana kekahi mea i kēia ʻano hana, a ʻaʻohe ona mea e pili ai me ka hilinaʻi. A ʻo ka manawa paha kēia e noho i lalo a nīnau iā ʻoe iho no ke aha ʻoe i pili ai me ka hilinaʻi ʻole i loaʻa iā ʻoe ka manawa kūpono e kau pono ai.
ʻO ka hilinaʻi ʻole i ka pilina hiki ke loaʻa nā hopena weliweli ʻaʻole wale ma ka pilina ponoʻī akā ma ka psyche a me ke olakino no nā hoa ʻelua a wahine paha. Inā ʻike ʻoe ʻaʻole ʻoe e hilinaʻi i kāu hoa ʻaʻole ia ka manawa e hana ai ʻoe i kekahi mea e pili ana iā ia, i hiki ai iā ʻoe ke leʻaleʻa i nā mea kupaianaha o ka pilina aloha a hilinaʻi hoʻi i ka wā e hiki mai ana.