Anter
- Pehea mākou i komo ai i kēia kolohe?
- Nā kumu e male ai ka poʻe ma hope o ke ola
- ʻO ka papa ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo kūkā ʻewalu pule
- Mākaukau paha 'oe?
ʻO ka pākēneka o ka male ma ʻAmelika Hui Pū ʻIa e olakino nei he haʻahaʻa haʻahaʻa.
A ke piʻi mau nei ka nui o ka male male i kēlā me kēia makahiki.
No laila he aha kā mākou e hana ai? Pehea mākou e hoʻololi ai i kēia? Pono paha mākou e male ma hope ma ke ola?
No nā makahiki 30 i hala iho nei, ke kōkua nei ka mea kākau mea kūʻai aku maikaʻi, mea aʻoaʻo, Life Coach a me ke kuhina ʻo David Essel i kēlā me kēia mea i ka hoʻoholo inā mākaukau lākou no ka male, a i ʻole ʻaʻole, a e male paha lākou āpau, a i ʻole inā maʻalahi lākou. kali a hiki i ka hope o ke ola?
Ma lalo, hāʻawi ʻo David iā mākou i kona mau manaʻo no ke kūlana kaumaha o ka male ma kēia ʻāina.
"ʻO kaʻu ʻoihana, eia naʻe, ke hoʻomau nei e ulu exponentially me nā mea kūʻai mai a puni ka honua ma muli o ka weliweli ʻano o ka mare, ʻaʻole wale nō i ʻAmelika Hui Pū ʻIa akā ma nā wahi ʻē aʻe pū kekahi.
Pehea mākou i komo ai i kēia kolohe?
He aha kā mākou e hana ai e hoʻāʻo e hoʻēmi i ka helu o ka hemo, ʻoiai ma ka manawa like e hoʻonui ana i ka pākēneka o ka male e olakino a hauʻoli?
Ke ʻōlelo mākou he kaumaha ka mokuʻāina o ʻAmelika Hui Pū ʻIa, e ʻae wau e haʻi i ke kumu a mākou e manaʻoʻiʻo nei:
- Ma luna o 55% o ka male mua e pau i ka hemo male
- Ma kahi o 62% o ka lua o ka male ʻana e pau i ka hemo male
- Ma kahi o 68% o ka male ʻekolu e pau i ka male male
ʻAʻole anei ka manawa e ala ai?
Ua ʻano like nā helu helu no kekahi mau makahiki, akā ʻaʻohe mea e hana i kekahi mea e pili ana i kēia kūlana.
A no ka pākēneka o nā kāne e noho pū lōʻihi ana, i kaʻu mau makahiki he 30 ma ke ʻano he kākāʻōlelo, kahu ola a me ke kuhina nui, hiki iaʻu ke haʻi iā ʻoe he hapa liʻiliʻi wale nō o kēlā mau wā lōʻihi e hauʻoli nei.
ʻO ka poʻe he nui, ma muli o nā mea e like me ka codependency, noho i nā pilina maikaʻi ʻole no ka makaʻu i ka noho kaʻawale ʻana, ka palekana kālā a me nā kumu he nui hou aku.
Nā kumu e male ai ka poʻe ma hope o ke ola
Hoʻomaopopo wau i ka makahiki 2004, i ka manawa i hoʻokuʻu ʻia ai kaʻu puke kūʻai kiʻekiʻe "Lohi: ʻo ke ala wikiwiki loa e kiʻi i nā mea āpau āu e makemake ai," ua kākau mākou i kēlā manawa "ʻaʻole maʻamau ke ʻano o ke kāne no ka male a hiki i ka 30, he mau wahine. ʻaʻole oʻo i ke ʻano no kēia pae o ka hoʻokō a hiki i ko lākou 25 mau makahiki i hala. "
Akā mai ka 2004, ʻike wau i kahi loli nui e kaʻana aku ai au iā ʻoe i kēia manawa.
Kāne kāne. ʻIke wau i ka hapa nui o nā kāne i kēia mau lā i ke ʻano o ka naʻau, a mākaukau e hana i ka male lōʻihi ma kahi o 40 mau makahiki.
No nā kumu i ʻike ʻole ʻia e aʻu iho, ʻo ka nui o nā kāne aʻu e hana pū nei ma waena o nā makahiki 20 a 30 ʻaʻole i mākaukau no ka hoʻokō o ka male, nā keiki a me nā mea hou aʻe.
Me he mea lā ua hoʻolōʻihi ʻia kēia kiʻekiʻe o ke oʻo, a i kēia manawa ke hana pū wau me nā kāne i ka hala ʻana o nā makahiki 30 a i ke kakahiaka nui he 40 mau makahiki ua ʻike wau iā lākou e mākua i ka naʻau, a mākaukau e lawelawe i nā pilikia a me ka pīhoihoi e pili pū me ka loaʻa ʻana o hoa lōʻihi a me nā keiki paha.
Nā Wahine. ʻIke pū wau i ke ʻano like o nā hanana me nā wahine, ʻoiai 15 mau makahiki i hala e hana wau me kekahi mau wahine ma waena o nā makahiki o 21 a me 25 i hauʻoli loa e pili ana i ka male, nā keiki a me he mea lā ua ʻoi aku ko lākou koʻikoʻi i ka naʻau, akā i kēia lā , Paipai wau i kaʻu mau mea kūʻai aku wahine e kali a hiki i ka 30, ma mua o ka mākaukau o ka hapa nui o lākou e hoʻopaʻa i ka male lōʻihi a me ka ʻohana me nā keiki.
ʻO ka hopohopo me nā wahine he nui e kali ana a hiki i ka 30 o kā lākou male ʻana, a i ʻole e hoʻopaʻa i ka pili wā lōʻihi, a laila ʻike lākou i ke kaomi o ka loaʻa ʻana o nā keiki koke. Akā haʻi aku wau iā lākou i ka loaʻa ʻana o nā keiki i kāu 20, ʻoiai e hana paha ia no kekahi poʻe, nui loa nā poʻe me nā keiki i oʻo ʻole e lilo i mau makuahine a me nā makuakāne.
No laila, ke kumu o ka male lohi ʻana a me nā hopena ma ka ʻaoʻao o nā pros a me cons o ka male ʻana ma hope o ke ola, e hoʻoholo pono ai.
Eia kekahi mau manaʻo aʻu e makemake ai e kaʻana e hiki ai ke kōkua i ka hōʻemi ʻana i ka nui o ka male male a hoʻonui i ka nui o ka male male ma ko mākou ʻāina.
- E hoʻomau i ka hoʻolohi i ka male ʻana a hiki i kou ʻelemakule ʻana i ke ola. Manaʻo wau he mea koʻikoʻi kēia. A manaʻo maoli wau ʻo ia kekahi o nā mea nui a mākou e nānā aku ai, e pili ana i ka hana ʻana i nā ʻohana hauʻoli a olakino hoʻi i ka wā e hiki mai ana.
- ʻLelo aʻoaʻo ma mua o ka wā ma mua. Ma ke ʻano he kuhina ua male wau i kekahi mau kāne i loko o 15 mau makahiki i hala iho nei, a i ka hoʻomaka he koi ʻia naʻu e male i kahi kāne a lāua i hele ai i loko o kā mākou papa ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo kūkā ʻewalu pule.
I kekahi mau makahiki i hala aku nei ua hoʻomaka mākou e hoʻi i hope, nā poʻe e makemake iaʻu e male iā lākou ma ke kahakai, i nā mauna, i nā wahi huakaʻi akā ʻaʻole lākou i makemake e hele i loko o ka ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo a ka wahine ma mua o ka male.
I ka wā mua ua maikaʻi wau me ka hoʻopōkole ʻana i ka hana aʻoaʻo aʻoaʻo ma mua o ka male, akā i kēia manawa ma hope o ka ʻike ʻana i ke kūlana o kā mākou male ma kēia ʻāina ua hoʻi wau i ka hōʻoia ʻana ua hoʻopau kekahi mau kāne aʻu e male ai i ka papa ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo aʻoaʻo ʻewalu pule ma mua.
ʻO ka papa ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo kūkā ʻewalu pule
I loko o kēia papahana he ʻewalu pule, kamaʻilio mākou e pili ana i ka hana a nā kāne a me nā wahine i ka male ʻana, ke kamaʻilio nei mākou e pili ana i ka hānai ʻana i nā keiki, ka mea a kēlā me kēia mea e manaʻo ai e like ke ʻano o kā lākou moekolohe ʻana, ka mea nāna e mālama i nā kālā, aia paha kekahi ʻano haipule a i ʻole ʻuhane no nā mākua a me nā keiki, aia kekahi pilikia me nā makuahōnōwai e pono ai mākou e mālama ma mua o ka male, a me nā ʻano kumuhana ʻē aʻe e ʻike maoli i ka ʻaoʻao like o kēia mau mea ʻelua i ke ola. .
Manaʻo wau i kēlā me kēia kuhina, i kēlā me kēia kahuna, i kēlā me kēia rabi e hana i ka male i kēia lā, pono e hoʻi i ka hōʻoia ʻana i kā lākou papahana aʻoaʻo lōʻihi ma mua o ka male ʻana e pono ai kēia mau mea kūʻai ma mua o ka male.
ʻAʻohe hoʻokoe, ʻaʻohe kumu ʻē aʻe.
- Aia kekahi mea pepehi kanaka kūpono i ka pilina?
I loko o kā mākou puke kūʻai nui "kūʻai!" Slate i kāu mau pahu hopu ", kamaʻilio mākou e pili ana i ka" David Essel's 3% rula o ka pili aloha ", ka mea i ʻōlelo maʻamau inā ʻo ka mea āu e noʻonoʻo nei e pili ana i ka male, he mea hiki i kāu mea hana make, inā ʻaʻole lākou e makemake e hoʻoponopono. a hemo i kēia mau palaka mai ka pilina, a laila haʻahaʻa loa nā kūʻē o ka pilina.
No laila he aha kāu poʻe pepehi kanaka hana, a loaʻa paha i kāu hoa o kēia manawa?
ʻO “killers Deal” kēlā mau mea hiki ʻole iā ʻoe ke noho pū.
ʻAʻole hiki i kekahi poʻe ke noho me kahi mea puhipaka, no laila inā pili lākou i kahi mea puhipaka, a makemake ʻole ka mea puhipaka e haʻalele, e paipai wau iā lākou e noʻonoʻo e pili ana i ka hele wāwae ʻana, no ka mea ʻaʻohe mea i ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi ma mua o ka paʻa ʻana i ka male a kahi hoʻokō wā lōʻihi inā loaʻa i kāu hoa kahi pilikia āu e koho ai ʻaʻole ʻae ʻia iā ʻoe.
A i ʻole manaʻo paha ʻoe e pili ana i ka male ʻana i kāu ipo i kēia manawa, a makemake ʻoe i nā keiki a kūʻē loa lākou iā ia. Kū ma aneʻi! He mea pepehi kanaka kēlā ʻaʻole wau e koi aku i kekahi e neʻe i mua a male i kekahi e kūʻē nei i nā manaʻo ma kēia pae.
- E noi i kekahi a me nā kāne male kūleʻa āpau ʻike ʻoe i ka mea a lākou e manaʻoʻiʻo ai ka mea huna i kā lākou kūleʻa is.
He mea hana kahiko kēia naʻu i hoʻohana me nā mea kūʻai aku he nui ma mua o koʻu male ʻana iā lākou, a hiki i nā hoahānau, nā ʻanakē, nā ʻanakala, nā kūpuna, nā kumu kula kiʻekiʻe o mua, nā kumu aʻo mua.
ʻLelo wau iā lākou e kikoo aku ma ka liʻiliʻi he ʻelima mau kāne i loaʻa ka male olakino a loaʻa ka haʻahaʻa i ka mea e hana ai.
Minamina loa wau i ka ʻike ʻana i ka nui o nā male i ʻano weliweli, me nā keiki e ʻehaʻeha nei i kēlā me kēia lā, a makemake wau e lilo i ʻāpana o ka hopena ma kahi o ka pilikia.
Ua kākau ʻia kēia ʻatikala i mea e kōkua ai iā mākou e hōʻemi i nā pili pono ʻole a me nā male ma kēia ʻāina a e hana i nā ʻohana hauʻoli a hana nui.
Mākaukau paha 'oe?
E noʻonoʻo pono i kēia mau mea āpau, e kaʻana like me kāu mau hoaaloha, a hiki pū mākou ke hōʻemi i ke kūlana pilina maikaʻi ʻole a mākou e ʻike pinepine nei i ko mākou ʻāina. "
Ua kākoʻo nui ʻia ka hana a David Essel e nā poʻe e like me ka hala ʻo Wayne Dyer, a ʻōlelo ka mea kaulana ʻo Jenny Mccarthy "ʻO David Essel ke alakaʻi hou o ka neʻe noʻonoʻo maikaʻi."
Ua hōʻoia ʻo Marriage.com iā David ma ke ʻano he kūkākūkā pili i luna a me nā loea o ka honua.
ʻO ia ka mea kākau o 10 mau puke, ʻehā o lākou i lilo i mea kūʻai aku helu ʻekahi.
No ka ʻike hou aku e pili ana i nā mea a pau a Dāvida e hana ai, e ʻoluʻolu e kipa aku iā www.davidessel.com