Anter
- Nā hakakā ma muli o ke kālā a i ʻole ka hopena o ka manawa makua ma nā keiki
- ʻO ka hoʻolilo manawa ʻana me nā mākua ʻelua hiki ke hōʻino no nā keiki
- ʻ .lelo aʻoaʻo co-makua
- 1. Mai kūkākūkā i kāu hakakā me kāu mau keiki
- 2. Paipai i kāu poʻe keiki e kamaʻilio me ka makua ʻē aʻe
- 3. E ʻike pono i kāu mau keiki e aloha ʻia e nā mākua ʻelua
- 4. Mai koho i kāu mau keiki i nā ʻaoʻao
- 5. Kaohi hoʻoikaika kino ke ʻōlelo ʻoe i kāu poʻe keiki
- He paʻakikī ke koho ʻana i kēia ala akā pono ia
Hiki i nā keiki ke hauʻoli e hānai ʻia e hoʻokahi makua wale nō? Ae nō hoʻi. Akā pōmaikaʻi nui nā keiki i ka hānai ʻia ʻana e nā mākua ʻelua. ʻO ia ke kumu e koʻikoʻi e hoʻomaopopo pehea e launa pono ai me ka makua me kāu wahine ma mua.
I nā manawa he nui loa hiki i kahi makua ke hoʻopau i ka hoʻokaʻawale ʻana i ka makua ʻē aʻe, me ka ʻole paha. Manaʻo paha ka makua e pale ana lākou i kā lākou keiki akā ʻaʻole pēlā ka hihia.
He ʻokoʻa ka manaʻo o nā mākua no ka mea ʻoi loa no kā lākou keiki. Manaʻo paha kekahi makua e pono i nā keiki ke komo i nā haʻuki kime ʻoiai manaʻo ka manaʻo ʻē aʻe he mea nui nā hana i nā mele a i ʻole nā hana hana keaka.
Ke manaʻo ʻia kahi makua e uku no kā lākou mahele o nā hana a nā keiki inā paha ʻaʻole lākou e manaʻo he mea maikaʻi loa ia no kā lākou keiki, hiki ke loaʻa kahi hakakā.
Nā hakakā ma muli o ke kālā a i ʻole ka hopena o ka manawa makua ma nā keiki
ʻIke lākou i ka haunaele.
ʻOiai ke hoʻāʻo nā mākua e hūnā, ʻike mau nā keiki i ka nohona o ko lākou mau mākua.
Manaʻo nā keiki i kekahi manawa he pili hou aku me ka makua i mālama ʻia a hoʻonui i ka manawa me lākou (ka makua mālama).
Hiki i nā keiki ke manaʻo ke kumakaia nei lākou i ka makua mālama ma o ka pili ʻana i ka makua mālama ʻole.
Hiki i nā keiki, no ke kūpaʻa ʻole i ka makua mālama, koho e hoʻolilo i ka manawa liʻiliʻi a me ka liʻiliʻi me ka makua mālama ʻole. Hiki ke lohi i kēia hanana, i ka hala ʻana o ka manawa a me ka hopena i ka ʻike maka ʻana o nā keiki i ka makua mālama ʻole.
ʻO ka hoʻolilo manawa ʻana me nā mākua ʻelua hiki ke hōʻino no nā keiki
Hōʻike ka noiʻi i nā keiki i lilo ma ka liʻiliʻi he 35% o ko lākou manawa me kēlā me kēia makua, ma mua o ka noho ʻana me hoʻokahi a ke kipa ʻana me nā mea ʻē aʻe, he mau pilina maikaʻi me nā mākua ʻelua, a ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o ka ʻoihana, ka pilikanaka a me ka psychologically.
Nui nā mākua manaʻo maikaʻi e komo i kēia kūlana. I ka manawa ʻōpio o nā keiki, nānā nui lākou i ko lākou ola iho, ʻaʻole makemake lākou e hana i ka pilina me ko lākou makua mālama ʻole.
E ʻike paha ʻoe iā ʻoe iho e pili ana i nā ʻōpio kūʻē e ʻoe iho ke makemake maoli ʻoe i ko lākou makua ʻē aʻe.
ʻ .lelo aʻoaʻo co-makua
I kēlā me kēia manawa o ke ola o kāu mau keiki, hiki i ka ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo co-makua ke kōkua i ka hoola ʻana i ka pilina me ka makua mālama ʻole.
ʻO ka poʻe lapaʻau nāna e hāʻawi i ka ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo kōkua pilikino pono e loaʻa ka ʻike me ka hana ʻana me nā ʻohana e pili ana i ka hemo male a kahi kahi makua i pilina koʻikoʻi me nā keiki.
Hana pū kēia poʻe hoʻoponopono me nā mākua, ma ka pākahi a i ʻole ka hui pū ʻana, a lawe pū i nā keiki i ka ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo e pono ai.
Me ka hewa ʻole, loiloi ka mea hoʻoponopono i ka hiki ʻana o ka ʻohana i kēia wahi a pehea e hoʻololi ai i ke kamaʻilio ʻana, ka lawena, a me nā pilina o nā lālā o ka ʻohana i hana pū lākou a hana pū kekahi me ka maikaʻi.
Eia nā ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo i ʻole ai ʻoe e komo i loko o ka hei o ka hoʻokaʻawale ʻana i kāu wahine ma mua a hana i nā pilikia no kāu mau keiki:
1. Mai kūkākūkā i kāu hakakā me kāu mau keiki
Mai kūkākūkā i nā hakakā āu e loaʻa nei me kāu ex i mua o kāu mau keiki, ʻoiai lākou e nīnau e pili ana iā lākou.
Inā nīnau kāu mau keiki e pili ana i kahi pilikia, e hoʻomaopopo iā lākou ke hana nei ʻoe me ko lākou makuahine a makua ʻole paha.
2. Paipai i kāu poʻe keiki e kamaʻilio me ka makua ʻē aʻe
Inā namunamu kāu mau keiki no kā lākou makua ʻē aʻe, paipai iā lākou e kamaʻilio pū me ia e pili ana i ia.
E hoʻomaopopo iā lākou e pono lākou e hana i nā mea me ko lākou makuahine a makua paha a ʻaʻole hiki iā ʻoe ke hana no lākou.
3. E ʻike pono i kāu mau keiki e aloha ʻia e nā mākua ʻelua
E hoʻokūpaʻa i kāu mau keiki i ke aloha o kā lākou makua ʻē aʻe iā lākou a ʻaʻole maikaʻi a hewa ʻole paha kekahi o ʻoukou, ʻokoʻa wale nō.
4. Mai koho i kāu mau keiki i nā ʻaoʻao
Mai ʻae i kāu mau keiki e ʻaoʻao pono. E mālama iā lākou ma waena o nā pilikia a nā mākua a kamaʻilio pololei i kāu ex e pili ana i nā mea e pili ana i ke kālā, ka papa kuhikuhi, a pēlā aku.
5. Kaohi hoʻoikaika kino ke ʻōlelo ʻoe i kāu poʻe keiki
E akahele i kāu kamaʻilio ʻana me kāu poʻe keiki. Pale i nā ʻōlelo e like me:
- "ʻAʻole makemake ʻo Pāpā e uku i kāu mau haʻawina ballet."
- "E hāʻule mau ana kou makuahine iā ʻoe!"
- "ʻAʻohe aʻu kālā e uku ai no kēlā no ka mea hoʻohana wau i 30% o koʻu manawa e hana nei e uku i ka ʻāpana kālā i kou makuahine."
- "No ke aha e hele ʻole mai ana ʻo Pāpā e ʻike i kāu pāʻani kinipōpō hīnaʻi?"
Inā ʻike ʻoe iā ʻoe iho e hana i kekahi o nā mea i luna, e kala aku i kāu mau keiki a hōʻike iā lākou e hana nei ʻoe i ka hoʻololi ʻana i ke ala e launa pū ai me ko lākou makuahine a makua paha.
He paʻakikī ke koho ʻana i kēia ala akā pono ia
He paʻakikī e hele i ke ala kiʻekiʻe akā hoʻololi maoli ia i ke ola o kāu mau keiki. Eia hou, e ʻike ʻoe i ka ʻoi aku o kou ola ma nā ʻano like ʻole. E hōʻemi iki ʻoe i ke koʻikoʻi i kou ola a e kūkulu i kahi pilina hana maikaʻi me kāu ex i ʻole ʻoe e lawelawe hoʻokahi i nā pilikia o kāu keiki.
E nānā ʻoe i mua i nā hana a i ʻole nā ʻaha kūkā kumu ma kahi o ka makaʻu iā lākou. ʻAʻole pono ʻoe i mau hoaaloha maikaʻi loa me kāu ex a hoʻolauleʻa pū i nā lā nui akā ʻo ka loaʻa ʻana o kahi pilina hana maikaʻi kekahi ala nui e hōʻoia i ka ola ʻole o kāu mau keiki i kāu male male akā ulu i kou ʻohana ma hope o ka hemo.