Anter
- 1. ʻO ka moekolohe kahi mea o ka wā i hala
- Paipai ʻia - Mālama i kaʻu papa male
- 2. Ua make ke kamaʻilio me ka dodo
- 3. Pili ka huaʻōlelo 'housemates' i kāu pilina
- 4. Ke ʻuwā nei kou ʻōpū iā ʻoe no ka mea ua hewa kekahi mea
- 5. Ke nānā nui nei ʻoe i ka makemake o haʻi
- 6. Ua hooki oe i ka hakaka ana
- 7. ʻO ke ola me ka ʻole o kāu wahine kahi moemoeā āu e leʻaleʻa nei
Inā ua male ʻoe a ke manaʻo nei ʻoe me he mea lā ua hana ʻia a haki paha ka manawa, ʻo ka ʻike ʻana i ka wā e haʻalele ai i ka male kahi pilikia. ʻO ka mea i hoʻohui pinepine ʻia e nā manaʻo piʻoloke a me nā makaʻu ma kāu ʻaoʻao no ke ʻano o ke ola ma hope o ka hemo ʻana.
ʻAʻohe mea kahaha i ka nui o ka poʻe ʻike ʻole i ka wā e haʻalele ai i ka male male pinepine a noho no ka hōʻoluʻolu ma kahi o ke alo wale ʻana i ke ola.
Akā me nā noiʻi ʻae ʻia i ka Gottman Institute (nā loea i ka pilina) e hōʻike ana i ka poʻe ma kahi male maikaʻi ʻole e hōʻike i nā kiʻekiʻe kiʻekiʻe o ka haʻahaʻa, ka hopohopo, a me ke kaumaha ʻaʻole ia ke koho olakino ke koho ʻoe e noho i kēia ʻano male.
No laila pehea ʻoe e ʻike ai i ka manawa e haʻalele ai i ka male a i ʻole he waiwai paha ke mālama?
Eia kekahi mau laʻana o nā kumu e koho ai kekahi e haʻalele i ka male, e kōkua iā ʻoe e hoʻoholo paʻa e pili ana i ke ʻano āu e pono ai e lawe i kou ola.
1. ʻO ka moekolohe kahi mea o ka wā i hala
ʻO ka male kolohe ʻole me ka ʻole o ke kamaʻilio e pili ana i ke kumu o ka male ʻole ʻana o kāu male ma ke ʻano he hōʻailona hōʻailona aia kekahi mea hewa i kāu male ʻana.
Ma hope o nā mea āpau, ʻo ia ka pilina ma waena o nā kāne e hoʻololi i ka pilina mai platonic i kahi aloha aloha.
Inā ʻaʻole hiki iā ʻoe ke hele i lalo i ke kumu no ka male ʻole o kāu male, e noʻonoʻo paha ʻoe i ka manawa e haʻalele ai i ka male a inā ʻoe e noho a ʻae i ka nele o ka pili.
ʻOiai manaʻo mākou ʻaʻole e hoʻokō ʻia ka noho ʻana no ka hapanui o ka poʻe.
Paipai ʻia - Mālama i kaʻu papa male
2. Ua make ke kamaʻilio me ka dodo
Inā ua hoʻohaʻahaʻa ʻia kāu kamaʻilio ʻana i nā ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo pōkole a i ʻole nā manaʻo e pili ana i kou ola o kēlā me kēia lā a ʻaʻohe hohonu o laila, a ʻaʻole hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻomanaʻo ʻoiai ka manawa hope loa i kamaʻilio kamaʻilio maikaʻi ʻia me kāu wahine a laila lawe i kēlā ma ke ʻano he kuhi. awry kekahi mea i kāu pilina.
Inā kū kēia hanana i loko o kāu male, ʻo ka hana mua ka mea e hoʻāʻo e kamaʻilio me kāu wahine e pili ana i kahi āu i kaʻawale ai a pehea e hiki ai iā ʻoe ke hoʻoponopono.
Hiki iā ʻoe ke ʻimi i kahi ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo e kōkua ai iā ʻoe e ʻike i kou ala i kekahi i kekahi, akā inā ʻaʻole ia e kōkua iā ʻoe a ʻo ka mea nui inā ʻoe e noho ana i ka male ʻole male ʻole, ʻaʻole paha ka nīnau i ka wā e haʻalele ai i ka male. ʻoi aku paha ka 'pehea' ma kahi.
3. Pili ka huaʻōlelo 'housemates' i kāu pilina
Ua lilo ʻoe i mau hoa home a ma kahi o nā mea aloha i ka pilina aloha? Ke ola nei ʻolua i kou ola ponoʻī akā noho wale ma lalo o ka hale like?
Inā ʻoe ka manawa e kamaʻilio e pili ana i kēia a hoʻāʻo e hoʻohui hou.
Inā ʻole, he kuhi kēia e kōkua iā ʻoe e ʻike i ka wā e haʻalele ai i ka male male - keu hoʻi inā ʻoe e ʻae nei i nā manaʻo ʻē aʻe i kēia ʻatikala.
4. Ke ʻuwā nei kou ʻōpū iā ʻoe no ka mea ua hewa kekahi mea
Kūpono mau ko mākou ʻōpū pono; ʻaʻole wale mākou e makemake e hoʻolohe iā ia a mai hana ʻole i ka pilina ma waena o nā bele hoʻōho e kani ana a me ke kūlana a mākou e ʻike ai.
Inā loaʻa iā ʻoe kahi ʻōpū puʻuwai e hana ʻole ana kāu male, malia paha e noʻonoʻo ana i ka wā e haʻalele ai ʻoe i ka male, a laila pono ʻoe e hana pēlā.
Ma mua o kou hoʻoholo ʻana i nā hoʻoholo kolohe, ʻaʻole ʻeha ke nānā ʻana me ʻoe iho e hoʻoholo i ka lōʻihi o ka noʻonoʻo ʻana o kēia ʻano iā ʻoe i kahi pilikia. ʻAkahi paha ʻoe mai ka ʻauwana ʻana a i ʻole maʻa mau ma laila?
Inā ma laila mau ia, hiki paha i ka manawa e hoʻolohe a haʻalele i ka male akā inā ua hana ʻia ia mai ka wā āu i heʻe ai a laila hiki paha iā ʻoe ke hoʻāʻo e pili hou ma mua o kou hoʻopau ʻana i nā mea.
5. Ke nānā nui nei ʻoe i ka makemake o haʻi
Nui nā wahine e noho i nā pilina ma mua o ka mea pono no ka mea he ʻano maʻamau lākou i ka waiho ʻana i nā pono o kekahi poʻe ma mua o kā lākou ponoʻī.
A ma muli o ka hana pinepine ʻana o nā wahine i ka hana a ka poʻe mālama, hiki iā lākou ke lilo i nā ʻāpana o kā lākou iho ponoʻī a me ke ʻano o ko lākou mau pono ponoʻī i ke kaʻina.
Inā ʻike ʻoe iā ʻoe iho e noʻonoʻo ana i nā ola o haʻi ma kahi o ka hana ʻana i kou ola iho, he hōʻailona paha ia e hōʻole nei ʻoe, a i ʻole e hoʻohoka iā ʻoe iho i kahi mea nui.
6. Ua hooki oe i ka hakaka ana
Inā ʻaʻole ʻolua e kamaʻilio pū ana me kāu wahine a ʻaʻole ʻoe e hakakā pū ana a laila ua lilo paha kou kuko a ua oki ka hoʻāʻo ʻana e hana i nā mea. ʻO kēia paha ka manawa e kūlou ai i waho?
ʻIke mākou he paʻakikī e ʻike i ka manawa e haʻalele ai i ka male, akā inā ʻaʻole ʻoe hoihoi a laila ʻaʻole paha ka manawa inā hiki iā ʻoe ke pili i ka helu aʻe.
7. ʻO ke ola me ka ʻole o kāu wahine kahi moemoeā āu e leʻaleʻa nei
Inā hauʻoli a hopohopo ʻole kāu moemoeā me ka ʻole o kāu wahine, nui ka pilikia ma aneʻi. Aia paha ʻoe i ke kaʻina hana o ka hoʻokaʻawale ʻana iā ʻoe iho i ka naʻau mai ke ola male.
He ala ia o ka hoʻomākaukau ʻana iā ʻoe iho no ka mea hiki ʻole ke hiki ke haʻalele ʻoe i ka male, hiki iā ʻoe ke lawelawe. Inā ʻaʻole ia he hōʻailona, ʻo ka manawa kēia e haʻalele. ʻAʻole maopopo iā mākou he aha !!