Anter
- Ke aloha
- 1. Mākala
- 2. Manaʻo ʻuhane
- 3. Pili hohonu
- Loaʻa ka moekolohe
- 1. Ka makemake pilikino
- 2. Ka māʻona o ke kino
- 3. ʻAʻohe pili hohonu
ʻO ka moekolohe he wahine wale nō. Akā inā ʻoe e hoʻohui i ke aloha i kāu wahine i ka hoʻohālikelike a laila hiki ke hoʻohuli i ka moekolohe i "ke aloha". ʻAʻole like ka moekolohe a me ke aloha ʻana. ʻIke wau, maopopo iaʻu, he clichéd kēlā. Aia nō ka ʻoiaʻiʻo i loko o kēlā ʻōlelo. Aia kekahi mau manawa ʻaʻole wau i ke ʻano e iho i lalo a ʻaʻole like ka manaʻo o ka moekolohe iaʻu me nā manawa o wau i kēlā manawa. E wāwahi kākou. Eia kekahi ʻokoʻa ma waena o ke aloha a me ka moekolohe. E kōkua kēia ʻatikala iā ʻoe e hoʻomaopopo i ke ʻano o ke kaʻina hana aloha a pehea ka ʻokoʻa o ka moekolohe.
Ke aloha
1. Mākala
Pono e hoʻomaʻamaʻa me ka maopopo o kāu wahine i kēlā me kēia ʻano o kāu pili. ʻO ka wehe a me ka pololei e pili ana i nā mea āpau e ʻae iā ʻoe a me kāu wahine e ʻike kekahi i kekahi ma kahi hohonu. Ka mea e ʻae ai iā ʻolua e ʻoluʻolu loa me kekahi.
Pono e lawe i ka transparency i loko o kāu ola wahine pū kekahi. Aia kahi hanana lua ʻole ke hiki i nā kāne ʻelua i ka male ke hōʻike ākea i kekahi i kekahi, me nā mea a lākou e leʻaleʻa ai a me nā mea a lākou e leʻaleʻa ai i kahi moe. ʻAʻole e haʻi hou aku i ka moekolohe maikaʻi.
2. Manaʻo ʻuhane
Hiki iā māua me kaʻu kāne ke ʻike mau i kahi ʻokoʻa ke hoʻohui hohonu mākou i ka wā e aloha ana. Aia kekahi mau manawa ke manaʻo ʻia me he mea ʻokoʻa mākou i ka honua akā e noho kokoke ana kekahi i kekahi a i ʻole, i kekahi manawa, he "moekolohe" wale nō. I kēlā mau manawa, ʻoi aku ka nui o nā manawa ma mua o ka ʻole, ʻike wau ʻaʻole mākou i komo i ke aloha aloha i loko o kekahi manawa a manaʻo i ka pono e hana i kēlā pilina ʻuhane. Ma hope o ko mākou hui pū ʻana a hui pū kekahi me kekahi i kēlā wahi, ʻike mākou ʻelua i ka ʻaoʻao like. He mea koʻikoʻi ka hana ʻana i ke aloha maoli no ka pilina pili naʻau i ʻike ʻole ʻia ma ka moekolohe maʻamau.
3. Pili hohonu
Ua lawe ʻia mai i koʻu manaʻo i ka manaʻo o kaʻu kāne i ke aloha nui ʻia ke makemake au iā ia. Ua ʻike wau ua ʻoi aku koʻu pili iā ia ke pili pili kino mākou i kēlā me kēia pule. Ua kōkua kēlā mau manaʻo ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ kukui kukui ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻ ʻua me a ʻu kāne me ka mea ʻino ke hana i ke pili kino i mea nui. Akā ʻaʻole ka wikiwiki wale nō. ʻLelo wau e pili ana i ke aloha maoli, aloha ʻole. He mea nui ka hana aloha ʻana i ka male, ʻaʻole lawa ka moekolohe wale.
Loaʻa ka moekolohe
1. Ka makemake pilikino
Me he mea lā ʻo kaʻu kāne a me aʻu wale nō e "moe kolohe", no ka mea ʻaʻole wau i ke ʻano a ʻo ia. A i ʻole ka ʻaoʻao ʻē. Ke kū kēlā, ʻaʻohe pilina pili maoli e hana nei, ʻo ka ʻiʻini wale e haʻalele.
ʻO ka mea e iho ai ka manaʻo nui i ke kumu. ʻAʻole mālama nui kekahi o mākou i kēlā manawa e pili ana i ka mea ʻē aʻe ʻaʻole makemake e moe kolohe. ʻO nā mea āpau e pili ana i kāna makemake a i ʻole nā mea āpau e makemake ai wau e pili ana i ka mea i loko o ke ʻano. ʻO kēia ʻano moekolohe, ʻoiai e ʻoluʻolu ana i ke kino, e waiho i hoʻokahi a ʻelua paha iā mākou e manaʻo nei i kahi tad i hoʻohana ʻia. I ka moekolohe a me ke aloha ʻana, ʻo kēia ka mea e nalowale ana i ka moekolohe, ka mālama no ka mea a ka hoa ʻē aʻe e makemake ai.
2. Ka māʻona o ke kino
He kānaka kākou a pau. No laila ma ke ʻano maʻamau, aia kekahi mau manawa (i kekahi manawa ʻoi aku ka pinepine ma mua o nā mea ʻē aʻe) ʻike mākou i ka pono e māʻona. ʻOiai he mea kupaianaha kēia makemake, hiki iā ia ke hānai i ka manaʻo pilikino i kāu male ke pili mau ia i nā pono o hoʻokahi wahine.
ʻO ia ka mea e hoʻihoʻi iā mākou i ka manaʻo makemake piha āpau.
ʻO ka laina lalo, inā ʻaʻole "hana aloha" nā kāne male ma ke ʻano he ke ʻano maʻamau ka manaʻo ʻana ʻaʻole paha manaʻo kekahi i ke kuko i kekahi manawa. I ka hana ʻana i ke aloha a me ka moekolohe ʻana, nele paha ka moekolohe i ka kuko akā aia mau ka pīhoihoi a me ka hauʻoli i ka wā aloha aloha o ke kāne a me ka wahine.
3. ʻAʻohe pili hohonu
ʻO ka ʻoiaʻiʻo kaumaha e pili ana i ka hana aloha ʻole ʻole ʻana i kāu ipo ʻo ia ka liʻiliʻi o ka manawa kūpono e hoʻohui maoli ai.ʻOiaʻiʻo, hiki iā ʻoe ke lilo i ʻoi o nā hoa aloha, akā me ka ʻole o ka pili hohonu e hoʻohui i kahi kāne a wahine, hoʻonani ʻia ʻoe i nā hoa noho.
ʻO ka hele wale ʻana me ka wikiwiki a i ʻole “e ʻāwīwī a e hoʻopau kāua i kēia” ʻano o nā hālāwai e keakea i kou pili a me kāu male. I ka hana ʻana i ke aloha a me ka moekolohe, inā ʻoe e manaʻo he aloha hou ka hana ʻana ke loaʻa ke kāne a me ke aloha, ua kuhihewa ʻoe.
ʻO ka ʻokoʻa ma waena o ka moekolohe a me ke aloha ʻana ʻaʻole ia he mea e hoʻoponopono koʻikoʻi ai, akā naʻe, ʻaʻole hiki ke kūkākūkā ʻia ke aloha hohonu e loaʻa kahi olakino olakino. Ua hana ʻia ka moekolohe e leʻaleʻa, leʻaleʻa a hoʻohui i kahi kāne a wahine. Inā paʻakikī a paʻakikī paha ʻoe a me kāu wahine i ka hana aloha ʻana ma mua o ka moekolohe wale ʻana, e hoʻāʻo e hana i kahi kahi e ulu pono ai nā manaʻo a me ke kino. Lōʻihi ka manawa a me ka hoʻomaʻamaʻa akā maikaʻi ia i ka hopena. Mai aloha i ka moekolohe wale no ka male ikaika a hoʻokō.