Anter
- Ke ʻōlelo nei nā noiʻi a me nā mea i nānā ʻia e pili ana i ke kumu e holo pono ʻole ai ka pilina wahine
- ʻOi aku ka maikaʻi o nā pilina kāne a ʻoi aku paha ma mua o nā heterosexual
- 1. Lawe i ka hoʻomākeʻaka i nā paio
- 2. Kaʻana like i ka mana
- 3. Lawe i nā mea i ʻoi aku ka pilikino
- 4. Ka hopena o nā ʻōlelo maikaʻi a maikaʻi ʻole
- Nā pilina wahine - nā kumu o kā lākou kūleʻa a me ka holomua
- 1. ʻOi aku ka expresses o ka poʻe Lesbians
- 2. Koho o ka neʻe pū ʻana
- Ke mālama pono nei i ka pilina: Ke hana nei i nā pilina wahine ma hope loa
- 1.E kali ana i kāu mau makemake e hoʻopiha piha ʻia
- 2. E nānā mau i nā pono o kāu hoa
- 3. E loaʻa i kahi manawa wale nō
ʻO nā puke e pili ana i ka dynamics pilina a me ka pilina e hoʻomalu ʻia e nā mea i ʻike ʻia ma nā pilina heterosexual-pili e pili ana i ke kāne a me ka wahine.
ʻOiai he nui nā puke e hāʻawi ana i ka ʻōlelo aʻoaʻo no ka pili wahine ma ka laulā, ʻaʻole nui ka ʻike a me ka ʻōlelo aʻo e pili ana i ka pili wahine.
No laila, ua hoʻoholo mākou e nānā i kekahi o nā haʻawina e kūkākūkā ana i nā kumu maʻamau no ke kumu e holo ʻole ai ka pilina wahine a me nā mea hiki iā ʻoe ke hana i mea e hope loa ai kāu pilina.
Ke ʻōlelo nei nā noiʻi a me nā mea i nānā ʻia e pili ana i ke kumu e holo pono ʻole ai ka pilina wahine
Ua ʻike ʻia nā noiʻi ʻana aia he mau kumu like ʻole no ke kumu e holo pono ʻole ai ka pilina wahine, ʻo ka hapa nui o nā kumu e like like me nā kumu e holo pono ʻole ai nā pilina heterosexual.
Ua ʻōlelo ʻo Dr. Ua alakaʻi ʻo John lāua ʻo Julie Gottman i kahi hoʻokolohua lōʻihi he 12 mau makahiki i ukali ʻia ma hope o 21 mau pilina wahine a me 21 mau wahine ma ka hoʻohana ʻana i nā ʻano like e like me kā lākou e hoʻopaʻa ai i nā pilina heterosexual e ka nānā ʻana i nā paio o nā kāne.
Kākoʻo nā mea i loaʻa mai i kā lākou noi ʻana i ka hoʻopiʻi e hakakā ana nā pilina kāne like me nā mea like me nā kāne pololei.
I nā huaʻōlelo a Kauka Gottman “ʻO nā kāne a me nā kāne wahine, e like me nā kāne pololei, hana pū me nā piʻi a me nā iho o nā pili kokoke. Akā, maopopo iā mākou e pili paha kekahi o kēia mau piʻi a i lalo i kahi ʻano kaiapili o ka noho kaʻawale ʻana mai ka ʻohana, ka hoʻokae i ka hana, a me nā mea pale kaiaulu ʻē aʻe i pili wale i nā kāne male a male wahine paha. "
ʻOi aku ka maikaʻi o nā pilina kāne a ʻoi aku paha ma mua o nā heterosexual
Aia kekahi mau mea i hoʻokaʻawale i ka pilina kāne like ma waena o ka pilina heterosexual.
1. Lawe i ka hoʻomākeʻaka i nā paio
Lawe nā kāne a ka wahine like e lawe i nā mea hoʻomākeʻaka i loko o kahi paio a mālama ʻia e noho ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi ma hope o ka hakakā inā hoʻohālikelike ʻia i nā pilina heterosexual.
2. Kaʻana like i ka mana
Aia kekahi mahele e kaʻana i ka mana ma waena o nā pilina o ka like me ka hoʻohālikelike ʻia i nā pilina heterosexual
3. Lawe i nā mea i ʻoi aku ka pilikino
I ke alo o nā hakakā, pili nā kāne a me nā wahine wahine i nā mea i hoʻoliʻiliʻi pilikino ʻia.
4. Ka hopena o nā ʻōlelo maikaʻi a maikaʻi ʻole
I ka pilina kāne a wahine ʻole, hana paha nā ʻōlelo maikaʻi ʻole i nā manaʻo ʻeha a ʻo nā manaʻo maikaʻi ka hopena maikaʻi aʻe.
ʻO kēia kekahi i ka hoʻohuli ke hoʻohālikelike ʻia i nā kāne kū pololei kahi e hōʻeha ai nā ʻōlelo maikaʻi ʻole i nā hoa, a ʻoi aku ka paʻakikī o nā ʻōlelo maikaʻi e hōʻoluʻolu i ka hoa.
Nā pilina wahine - nā kumu o kā lākou kūleʻa a me ka holomua
1. ʻOi aku ka expresses o ka poʻe Lesbians
ʻOi aku ka mānoanoa o nā kāne ma ka pili wahine ma mua o ka pili wahine.
Hāʻawi ʻia kēia i ka ʻoiaʻiʻo e ʻae ka kaiāulu i nā wahine e hōʻike i mua o nā kāne.
2. Koho o ka neʻe pū ʻana
ʻO kekahi mea i ʻike ʻia i nā pilina wahine ka mea ikaika o ke koho koke ʻana e neʻe pū a ʻoiai i ka hoʻomaka mua o ka pilina. Kapa ʻia kēia kaʻina hana ʻo U-Hauling.
ʻO ke kaumaha, ʻoiai ke neʻe pū nei o nā kāne male wahine, he kumu kēia i ʻike ʻia no ke kumu e holo pono ʻole ai kahi pilina wahine. Kākoʻo kēia nānā ʻana i ke aʻo ʻana iā Lawrence Kurnek i ka makahiki 1998, ka mea i nānā i ka noho pū ʻana me nā kāne male kāne a wahine kāne a me kā lākou pilina ikaika.
Ke alakaʻi nei kēia mau mea āpau i ka nīnau - inā ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi o ka pili wahine ma muli o Dr. Nānā ʻo Gottman, no ke aha lākou e holo pono ʻole ai?
Aia kahi hoʻokaʻawale i ʻike ʻia ma waena o ka maikaʻi o kahi pilina a Dr. Ua nānā ʻo Gottman a me ka hoʻopau wikiwiki ʻana o nā pilina wahine ma muli o ke aʻo ʻana iā Lawrence Kurnek.
Maluhia paha e kuhi i kēia mau kumu aʻe e hāʻawi iā mākou i kahi kumu maikaʻi no ke kumu e holo ʻole ai nā pilina wahine.
- Wikiwiki e hana, e like me ka mea i ʻike ʻia i ka h-hauling.
- Ka nele o ka moekolohe. ʻOi aku ka kiʻekiʻe o ka moekolohe a me ka pinepine i nā pilina wahine. Eia nō naʻe, inā ʻaʻole nā hoa ʻelua nā mea hoʻomaka, ʻaʻohe wahine e hiki mai.
- Ka nele o ke kākoʻo kaiāulu.
Me kēia mau kumu, manaʻo wau he mea nui ka nānā ʻana i ka hana ʻana i kahi pilina kahi e ulu ai nā hoa ʻelua a neʻe pū i mua.
Ke mālama pono nei i ka pilina: Ke hana nei i nā pilina wahine ma hope loa
Hiki i nā hoa ke hana i kēia mau hana e hope ai ko lākou pilina. Kamaʻāina paha kēia inā ua pili mua ʻoe i kahi pilina ma mua (heterosexual a homosexual paha).
E lawe i kahi hōʻoluʻolu -
1.E kali ana i kāu mau makemake e hoʻopiha piha ʻia
ʻO kēia kekahi o nā mea i poina ʻole i nā ʻano pilina like ʻole. Ke kuhi nei e hoʻokō mau ʻia kāu mau pono, e alakaʻi i nā hoka he nui.
Ma kahi o ka hana ʻana i kēia, e ʻae aku i ka maikaʻi a me ka maikaʻi ʻole o kāu ʻaoʻao.
Wahi a Dr. Gottman, ʻo ka loaʻa ʻana o nā pilina maikaʻi me ka maikaʻi ʻole e hōʻoia i ka loaʻa mau o kā ʻolua mea i nā manawa o nā pilikia.
2. E nānā mau i nā pono o kāu hoa
Ma ke ʻano he lesbians, mālama mau ka mālama makuahine.
Eia nō naʻe, hiki ke ola, a i kekahi manawa kaumaha ke ola i nā hoa. I kēia mau manawa, e nānā mau a hoʻomaʻamaʻa i ke aloha. Loaʻa ka pepeiao hoʻolohe i nā pono o kāu hoa.
I ka wela o kahi hoʻopaʻapaʻa, hiki iā ʻoe ke hoʻohana i nā hana hōʻoluʻolu e kōkua iā ʻoe iho e hoʻomaha.
3. E loaʻa i kahi manawa wale nō
E hoʻomohala a mālama i kou ʻano ponoʻī a me nā hoihoi.
ʻO ka loaʻa ʻana o kahi manawa wale nō e ʻae iā ʻoe e hoʻomohala i kēia mau hoihoi i hoʻohui i ka mea a ʻolua e hiki ai ke kamaʻilio e pili hou ana i kekahi i kekahi.