Anter
- 1. Pono e mahalo ʻia nā kāne ma mua o nā mea āpau
- 2. ʻAʻohe hānai ʻia nā kāne e kaʻana like i nā manaʻo
- 3. Hiki iā mākou ke hoʻolohe akā makemake mākou e hoʻoponopono
- 4. Makemake nā kāne e mālama ʻia
- 5. Makaʻu nā kāne ke ʻike ʻia mai nāwaliwali
- 6. ʻO ka helu ʻana i kāu kāne paha ka mea maikaʻi ʻole i hiki iā ʻoe ke hana
- 7. Pono ke kāne i kāna wahine i wahine hauʻoli loa
- 8. Makemake nā kāne e makemake ʻia ʻoe
Ma ke ʻano he wahine, ua noʻonoʻo paha ʻoe:
"He aha ka mea a nā kāne e makemake maoli ai?"
Eia kahi papa inoa kikoʻī e wehewehe i nā kikoʻī a me ka ʻike i ka makemake o ka hapa nui o nā kāne i ka wahine e ʻike.
1. Pono e mahalo ʻia nā kāne ma mua o nā mea āpau
ʻO ka mea e manaʻo ai ke kāne e like me ke kāne ka mahalo. Inā paha he haipule ʻoe ʻaʻole paha, he ʻoiaʻiʻo ka mea a ka baibala i ʻōlelo ai e pili ana i nā kāne a me ka mahalo. Aia kekahi puke na Kauka Eggerichs i kapa ʻia ʻo "Love and respect" kahi e hele ai i loko o nā kikoʻī e pili ana i ke koʻikoʻi o nā wahine i kā lākou kāne. ʻO ka mahalo i kahi kāne e like ia me ka Spinach iā Popeye ... hāʻawi ia iā ia i ka ikaika a aneane hiki iā ia ke noʻonoʻo ʻole. He mea nui kēia no ka mea aia kekahi mau mea e pono ai nā wahine e hana i nā kāne akā ma kahi o ke kūkulu ʻana iā ia a hoʻomākaukau iā ia no ka hana, ua wāwahi ʻo ia iā ia a laila hoʻopiʻi iā ia no ka "hana ʻole." Pehea ke ʻano o ka hōʻino ʻole? Ke nīnau nei i nā mea āpau āna e hana ai. Ke hoʻohewa nei i kāna mau hoʻoholo a me nā kumu. Nui aʻe nā mea e pili ana i ka mahaloʻole i kā Kauka Eggerichs puke.
2. ʻAʻohe hānai ʻia nā kāne e kaʻana like i nā manaʻo
Ke keikikāne ke kāne ʻaʻole lākou e launa pū e kaʻana like i ko lākou naʻau a me ko lākou mau manaʻo. Hana ʻia nā keikikāne e kāohi i ko lākou manaʻo maoli a hoʻohālike he paʻakikī lākou a ʻaʻole ʻeha. Ua ʻike wau i kahi wikiō ma ka pāpaho kaiapuni o kahi keikikāne 4 makahiki e ʻoki lauoho ʻana. ʻAʻole maopopo iaʻu inā ʻeha paha ke keiki ʻaʻole paha akā ke ʻuwā nei ʻo ia me he mea lā ʻeha. E kū ana kona makuakāne me ia, maikaʻi ia, akā ʻaʻole maikaʻi ka mea a kona makuakāne e ʻōlelo nei. Ua haʻi ʻo ia i kāna keiki, "e kāhea i ka uē ... he kāne ʻoe ... e paʻakikī." Ua kaumaha maoli ke wikiō iaʻu no ka mea a ka makuakāne i ʻike ʻole ai e haʻi ana i kāna keiki 4 makahiki inā makemake ʻo ia e lilo i kāne ʻaʻole hiki iā ia ke hōʻike i kāna mea e manaʻo nei ... mai uē nā kāne. ʻLelo pū ʻo ia iā ia "ʻoʻoleʻa" ʻo ia hoʻi ʻaʻole uē. ʻO ka mea a nā keiki e makemake nui ai e hana e like me ka poʻe mākua, no laila e haʻi iā ia "he kāne" e hana ʻo ia i ka mea i manaʻoʻiʻo ʻia e nā kāne ... kāohi i ko lākou mau manaʻo. I ke keikikāne, hānai ʻia nā kāne e "paʻakikī" a hana ikaika.
3. Hiki iā mākou ke hoʻolohe akā makemake mākou e hoʻoponopono
Ke hele mai kahi wahine i kāna kāne me kahi pilikia, ʻo ka hapa nui o nā manawa makemake ʻo ia e hoʻolohe wale. Akā ʻo nā kāne he fixers a me nā mea hoʻoponopono pilikia. Makemake lākou e hoʻoponopono i ka pilikia no kā lākou lede. ʻOiai e aʻo nā kāne ʻaʻole ia e pili mau ana i ka hoʻoponopono ʻana i nā mea, pono ka wahine e hoʻomaopopo ʻo ke ʻano wale nō ia o nā kāne. Makemake kēlā me kēia kāne e lilo i koa. Akā ʻo ka meʻe i kekahi manawa manaʻo ʻo ia ʻaʻole hoʻolohe. ʻAʻole pono kēlā. E hoʻomanaʻo, ʻoi aku ka noʻonoʻo o nā kāne a ʻoi aku ka naʻau o nā wahine.
4. Makemake nā kāne e mālama ʻia
Ke haʻi wau i nā wahine makemake nā kāne e mālama pono wau e wehewehe koke ʻaʻole ʻo ia e ʻimi iā ʻoe i makuahine nona. Aia he ʻokoʻa ma waena o ka mālama ʻia ʻana a mālama ʻia e like me ke keiki. ʻOiai he mea maoli, ʻo ka mālama ʻana i kāu kāne e like me kāu keiki e loaʻa iā ʻoe nā hopena maikaʻi ʻole. Eia nō naʻe, makemake nā kāne i ka hānai a ka makuahine e hāʻawi ai, ʻaʻole wale ma kahi pae "ʻaʻohe mea kōkua a haʻahaʻa" ʻoe.
E manaʻoʻiʻo paha ʻaʻole paha, maʻalahi nā kāne. Ke mālama nei i kāu kāne e like me kēia: ʻAʻole ʻo ia i loko o ka lole komo maʻemaʻe a holoi ʻoe nona. ʻAʻohe ona lole ʻoluʻolu 'a kūʻai aku ʻoe iā ia hou. He lōʻihi kona lā ma ka hana a ma kahi o ke kali a hiki i kona hoʻi ʻana i ka home e nīnau i kāna makemake e ʻai, ua hoʻomākaukau mua ʻoe iā ia i kekahi mea. ʻO ke kumu, ʻo ka mālama ʻana i kāu kāne ʻo ia hoʻi ka maʻalahi o kona ola. I kēia manawa e ʻōlelo paha kekahi, "no ke aha e pono ai iaʻu e hoʻomaʻalahi i kona ola?" ʻAʻole ia he pono maoli, he makemake ia. Akā ma ʻō aku o ka mea e kamaʻilio i ka mahalo a me ke aloha a mālama iā ia, e like ia me ka putty i kou mau lima. ʻOiaʻiʻo ua ʻoi aku ka maʻalahi o ka maʻalahi no ka mea aia kekahi mau kumu ʻē aʻe i ka pilina e hiki ke hoʻopili i ka "putty-ness kāne." ʻAʻole hana ka hapa nui o nā wahine i kēia no kā lākou kāne no ka mea manaʻo lākou ʻaʻole pono i kā lākou kāne. Inā he ʻoiaʻiʻo ʻaʻole paha, e hana ana kēia i nā hopena maikaʻi a hoʻonui iā ia ke aloha iā ʻoe.
Akā ma ʻō aku o ka mea e kamaʻilio i ka mahalo a me ke aloha a mālama iā ia, e like ia me ka putty i kou mau lima. ʻOiaʻiʻo he ʻoi aku ka maʻalahi no ka mea aia mau nā kumu ʻē aʻe i ka pilina e hiki ke hoʻopili i ka "putty-ness kāne." ʻAʻole hana ka hapa nui o nā wahine i kēia no kā lākou kāne no ka mea manaʻo lākou ʻaʻole pono i kā lākou kāne. Inā he ʻoiaʻiʻo ʻaʻole paha, e hana ana kēia i nā hopena maikaʻi a hoʻonui iā ia ke aloha iā ʻoe.
5. Makaʻu nā kāne ke ʻike ʻia mai nāwaliwali
He mea hoihoi ia i ka manawa a mākou e hoʻolilo ai e hōʻoia i nā poʻe ʻē aʻe ʻaʻole mākou he kanaka. He aha kaʻu manaʻo ma ia mea? Makemake wau e hana i ka manawa i mea e manaʻoʻiʻo ai ka poʻe aia pū mākou āpau, ʻaʻole mākou e hakakā nei me ke ola a ʻaʻohe o mākou hopohopo, nā mea āpau e hoʻolilo iā mākou he kanaka. Akā ʻike nā kāne i kēia ma ka hohonu hohonu no ka mea pono mākou e ʻaʻa i kēia mask "invincible" i nā manawa āpau i mea e pale ai i ko mākou kāne kāne. Mai ka wā kamaliʻi mai, haʻi ʻia mākou e paʻakikī. Ke manaʻo ka wahine i kahi kāne manaʻo pinepine lākou i ka kāne kāne ikaika, ikaika a paʻakikī hoʻi e like me Leonidas mai ke kiʻi ʻoniʻoni 300.
ʻO kekahi o kaʻu hōʻike kīwī punahele i koʻu wā kamaliʻi ʻo Good Times, a he makua kāne ikaika kona ma James Evans. Makemake nā kāne āpau i kēlā ikaika, kaʻoiaʻiʻo, ka hilinaʻi a me ka paʻakikī. Akā ʻo ka mea ʻaʻole ʻike ka wahine ʻoi aku ia ma mua o kahi kiʻi a mākou e makemake ai, he kiʻi makaʻu mākou i ka loaʻa ʻole. ʻO kekahi o nā mea weliweli loa i ke kāne ke ʻike ʻia me ka nāwaliwali e kāna wahine. ʻOi aku ka makaʻu i kēia mau kāne e hana i ka paʻakikī ma mua o ko lākou, ʻoi aku ka wiwo ʻole ma mua o ko lākou maoli a ʻoi aku ka hilinaʻi ma mua o ko lākou maoli, a ʻo ia mau mea wale nō ka mea e hoʻokau i ka haʻaheo a me ka haʻaheo. ʻO ka haʻaheo a me ka haʻaheo he hōʻailona o ka hilinaʻi ʻole.
ʻO kekahi o ke ala wikiwiki e hoʻonāukiuki i kahi kāne e kāhea iā ia nāwaliwali, minamina, a i ʻole wimp. ʻAʻole maopopo ka hapa nui o nā wahine i ka hele wāwae ʻana o nā kāne me kēia makaʻu mau e ʻike ʻia ko lākou lāhui ma o kā lākou helehelena o ka paʻakikī. ʻO ka ʻoiaʻiʻo, he makaʻu hoʻi nā kāne. ʻAʻole maopopo ʻole nā kāne. Loaʻa nā insecurities o nā kāne. ʻO ka mea i makemake ai nā kāne kahi kahi e hiki ai iā lākou ke nāwaliwali a makemake lākou i kēlā wahi me kā lākou wahine. Akā he nui nā pale e pale i kēia mai ka hana ʻana a pinepine ʻole ʻike nā wahine pehea lākou e hoʻohui ai i nā pale i kū i ka kaiāulu. Inā he kāne kāu e aloha ai, e hana i ka hāʻawi ʻana iā ia i kahi e hiki ai iā ia ke nāwaliwali a kaʻana like i kāna mau makaʻu me ka hoʻopaʻi ʻole ʻia no ia.
6. ʻO ka helu ʻana i kāu kāne paha ka mea maikaʻi ʻole i hiki iā ʻoe ke hana
Kūkulu kēia i ka mea hope loa. Ke hoʻomaʻamaʻa ka wahine i kahi kāne he paʻakikī iā ia e hoʻopoina iā ia a loaʻa hou iā ia. Hiki iā ia ke neʻe me ke ola a nānā paha inā maikaʻi nā mea āpau i ka pilina akā hiki iaʻu ke hōʻoia iā ʻoe ʻaʻole ia ka hihia. Loaʻa i nā kāne kēia mea a mākou e kapa nei he ego a he palupalu loa ia. Ma muli o ka hoʻolilo ʻana o ka manawa i ka kāne i ka manawa a me ka hoʻāʻo e hoʻāʻo ai e hōʻike i ko lākou kāne kāne, ʻaʻohe pono o nā wahine i ka palupalu maoli o nā kāne. Ke kū nei ʻoe i ka wela o ke kaua, ke hoʻopaʻapaʻa nei me kāu kāne, e akahele e ʻōlelo ʻole i nā mea i hiki ʻole iā ʻoe ke hoʻihoʻi. He ʻōlelo aʻo maikaʻi kēlā no kēlā me kēia.
7. Pono ke kāne i kāna wahine i wahine hauʻoli loa
Ua maopopo iaʻu ʻo ke kumu o Barack Obama i lilo ai i Pelekikena ʻEleʻele mua o ʻAmelika Hui Pū ʻIa ma muli o Michelle Obama. Ma hope o kēlā me kēia kāne ikaika he wahine kākoʻo ia. ʻO nā kāne ka mea maikaʻi loa ke loaʻa iā lākou nā wahine i ko lākou mau kihi e hauʻoli ana iā lākou i ka nui. Aia kekahi moʻolelo hoʻomākeʻakeʻa i haʻi ʻia e pili ana i nā wahine a nā pelekikena. ʻO ka Pelekikena a me ka wahine mua e hoʻolauleʻa ana i ko lākou lā makahiki a ʻo ka mea lawelawe nāna i kali iā lākou he kāne aloha ia na ka Lā ʻEa Mua. I ka wā a ka Lede Mua i haʻi aku ai i ka Pelekikena ʻo wai ke kāne āna i ʻōlelo ai, “maikaʻi au e hauʻoli ua hauʻoli ʻoe ʻaʻole ʻoe i male iā ia. ʻAʻole ʻoe e male i ka Pelekikena o ka U.S. ” Nānā ʻo ia iā ia a ʻōlelo, "ʻAʻole, inā wau i male iā ia a laila e lilo ʻo HE pelekikena." ʻ telllelo pinepine wau i nā wahine ʻaʻole lākou i ʻike i ka mana i loaʻa iā lākou. Hiki i nā kāne ke hoʻoneʻe i nā kuahiwi akā ʻo nā wahine ka mea i hāʻawi iā lākou i ke kumu a me ka hoʻoulu e hana pēlā.
8. Makemake nā kāne e makemake ʻia ʻoe
ʻIke ʻia nā kāne ma ke ʻano he mea alualu akā hoʻokahi wale nō i ka pilina e makemake ke kāne e makemake pū kekahi. ʻAʻole makemake ʻo ia e lilo i mea hoʻomaka i ka moekolohe, hāʻawi i nā mea pūʻiwa a i ʻole nā mea e hāʻawi i ka lomilomi. ʻAʻole maopopo ka wahine i kekahi manawa i ke koʻikoʻi o ka hana ʻana i kā lākou kāne e like me kona makemake iā ia e like me kāna makemake e makemake ai.